Decide which game to play. Is winning that important all of the time?
Jump in, ready or not. Take risks, you may not be able to tomorrow.
Keep on truckin'. You know the highway, keep up with the flow.
Grab opportunities. Can you recognize one or are you always thinking about it?
No excuses allowed. Of course not, don't whine either.
Ignore naysayers. They don't know any more than you do.
Never personalize. It's just a game, your next boss may be around the corner.
Whistle while you work!
Don't yell fire when you're downsized.
Smiling helps a lot.
By: Marilyn J. Tellez, M.A.
Certified Career Coach
email is: marilyn@doitnowcareers.info
web is: www.doitnowcareers.info
MJT Consulting
302 Park Avenue
Yakima, WA 98902
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Tools for Constructing the Road to Success
Too many times in the pursuit of our dreams, we loose sight of the total picture and instead settle on a small piece of it. A job, any job, whether it is in the conventional job market or any one of a number of work from home ventures all require the same thing - people of vision.
Vision sees the entire portrait, balanced, controlled, and proportionate while focus concentrates solely on one aspect of the portrait. Don't misunderstand, having focus is not a bad thing as long as it doesn't loose sight of vision.
In building your road to success you must take several things into account if you want your road to remain stable and strong. These are;
Objectives:
Ask yourself the following questions. Why do you want to go into business? Where do you want to be in 3 months, 6 months and 1 year? What will it take to get you there? Do you believe in what you're selling? Think about these and write down your answers. They will be the foundation upon which the rest of your business goals will be built.
Knowledge Base:
What we want to know here is how well you know your subject. Are you familiar with the products or services you will be representing? Do you have immediate access to training materials and technical support if you need it? Do you know where to get the materials and training? Have you researched your subject? As you are going to build these roads to success for yourself approach this part of your learning curve with a child like appetite for knowledge. You can never have enough tools! Just make sure they're the one's you need for the task at hand.
Using Your Resources:
A good manager regardless of industry knows his people. He knows their strengths and their weaknesses and will use these resources appropriately in helping his team achieve a particular goal. That same manager if he's true to himself, will also recognize his own weaknesses and strengths and surround himself with knowledgeable people that will offset or compliment the team.
Motivation:
You have to realistically find out what drives or motivates you towards success. For each one of us it will be something different. Maybe you're looking for financial freedom, extra time to enjoy life or perhaps you've just had enough of the rat race. Whatever your reasons, write them down and keep them somewhere so you can see them. If you're looking at a new car or house, cut out their picture and put them on your "wish" board so you can see what you're working towards.
Brass Tacks:
Finally, if we're going to put this all together we need to learn how to lead. But before we can do that, we need to learn how to follow first. Great leaders, people in authority, business owners and Entrepreneurs all need to learn how to temper their judgment with wisdom. We can learn a lot from people just by using our senses. Take a moment to stand back, listen, observe. By doing so, you are literally guaranteeing your success.
Keeping The Road On Terra Firma:
A final thought on keeping your "Road" on solid ground. You've got your objectives identified, your resources have come together nicely and everything is starting to gel - at the end of your day you need to ask; would I hire myself? If you have trouble answering that, start over again with the basics and re-examine your motivations and your goals. Be honest with yourself then move on. The road will have bumps. That's to be expected. Don't let these bog you down - use them to your advantage! If you think about it, that's the beauty of a mistake, it can be your best friend or worst enemy depending upon how you approach it.
Business Ethics:
I couldn't let this article go without mentioning business ethics - a trait that seems to be sorely misunderstood, often abused, and seldom used. If you don't possess a strong business ethic, in the end you will be found out and your credibility will be forever damaged. Too many times ethics are driven by politics within an office atmosphere to the point where the mission statement is just that - a statement and nothing more.
To many times I have sat in on meetings that either discussed rules, company ethics or customer service. I have also attended several seminars in which these themes were quite prevalent. What always amazed me however is that the "new" and "improved" ways of attracting customers or quality associates to your business were the same things that were in practice over 30 years ago! Someone tried to re-invent the wheel, re-packaged it in something shiny and is selling it to you as the cure for all your business woes.
Above all else, always remember that regardless of your business or station in life, you are a consumer and as such you should have a pretty good idea of your likes and dislikes.
While the statement "honesty is the best policy" is nothing new, my grandfather telling me it was always easier to tell the truth because a lie would always have to be remembered so it could be told over and over again, is new - not to me, but to others.
Something will have to drive you to the front away from the pack! What will it be? Each of use must choose those attributes and find the combination that will work but we must never loose sight of our goals or "sell" our souls to achieve them.
Regardless of what you may think, you can not teach someone Honor, Integrity, Loyalty or Truthfulness. They either have it or they don't. Remember, while you can lead a horse to water, you can't make him drink however, you can make him thirsty!
Chas is a Home Based Business Owner, Motivational Writer, and an Independent SFI Marketing Representative and may be reached at; http://work-from-home-make-extra-income.com or brothec@gawab.com
Vision sees the entire portrait, balanced, controlled, and proportionate while focus concentrates solely on one aspect of the portrait. Don't misunderstand, having focus is not a bad thing as long as it doesn't loose sight of vision.
In building your road to success you must take several things into account if you want your road to remain stable and strong. These are;
Objectives:
Ask yourself the following questions. Why do you want to go into business? Where do you want to be in 3 months, 6 months and 1 year? What will it take to get you there? Do you believe in what you're selling? Think about these and write down your answers. They will be the foundation upon which the rest of your business goals will be built.
Knowledge Base:
What we want to know here is how well you know your subject. Are you familiar with the products or services you will be representing? Do you have immediate access to training materials and technical support if you need it? Do you know where to get the materials and training? Have you researched your subject? As you are going to build these roads to success for yourself approach this part of your learning curve with a child like appetite for knowledge. You can never have enough tools! Just make sure they're the one's you need for the task at hand.
Using Your Resources:
A good manager regardless of industry knows his people. He knows their strengths and their weaknesses and will use these resources appropriately in helping his team achieve a particular goal. That same manager if he's true to himself, will also recognize his own weaknesses and strengths and surround himself with knowledgeable people that will offset or compliment the team.
Motivation:
You have to realistically find out what drives or motivates you towards success. For each one of us it will be something different. Maybe you're looking for financial freedom, extra time to enjoy life or perhaps you've just had enough of the rat race. Whatever your reasons, write them down and keep them somewhere so you can see them. If you're looking at a new car or house, cut out their picture and put them on your "wish" board so you can see what you're working towards.
Brass Tacks:
Finally, if we're going to put this all together we need to learn how to lead. But before we can do that, we need to learn how to follow first. Great leaders, people in authority, business owners and Entrepreneurs all need to learn how to temper their judgment with wisdom. We can learn a lot from people just by using our senses. Take a moment to stand back, listen, observe. By doing so, you are literally guaranteeing your success.
Keeping The Road On Terra Firma:
A final thought on keeping your "Road" on solid ground. You've got your objectives identified, your resources have come together nicely and everything is starting to gel - at the end of your day you need to ask; would I hire myself? If you have trouble answering that, start over again with the basics and re-examine your motivations and your goals. Be honest with yourself then move on. The road will have bumps. That's to be expected. Don't let these bog you down - use them to your advantage! If you think about it, that's the beauty of a mistake, it can be your best friend or worst enemy depending upon how you approach it.
Business Ethics:
I couldn't let this article go without mentioning business ethics - a trait that seems to be sorely misunderstood, often abused, and seldom used. If you don't possess a strong business ethic, in the end you will be found out and your credibility will be forever damaged. Too many times ethics are driven by politics within an office atmosphere to the point where the mission statement is just that - a statement and nothing more.
To many times I have sat in on meetings that either discussed rules, company ethics or customer service. I have also attended several seminars in which these themes were quite prevalent. What always amazed me however is that the "new" and "improved" ways of attracting customers or quality associates to your business were the same things that were in practice over 30 years ago! Someone tried to re-invent the wheel, re-packaged it in something shiny and is selling it to you as the cure for all your business woes.
Above all else, always remember that regardless of your business or station in life, you are a consumer and as such you should have a pretty good idea of your likes and dislikes.
While the statement "honesty is the best policy" is nothing new, my grandfather telling me it was always easier to tell the truth because a lie would always have to be remembered so it could be told over and over again, is new - not to me, but to others.
Something will have to drive you to the front away from the pack! What will it be? Each of use must choose those attributes and find the combination that will work but we must never loose sight of our goals or "sell" our souls to achieve them.
Regardless of what you may think, you can not teach someone Honor, Integrity, Loyalty or Truthfulness. They either have it or they don't. Remember, while you can lead a horse to water, you can't make him drink however, you can make him thirsty!
Chas is a Home Based Business Owner, Motivational Writer, and an Independent SFI Marketing Representative and may be reached at; http://work-from-home-make-extra-income.com or brothec@gawab.com
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Vision -- What Are You Doing Today Towards Achieving Your Vision?
Every man who accomplishes things sees first in his mind what he wishes to do. He puts away all doubt. It makes no difference how small or how large the thing you want to do may be; if you have an unlimited confidence in your ability to do it, you will do it. - Charles Fillmore
By definition, vision is a future orientation, a broad stroke picture that serves as the basis for making decisions or taking actions towards achieving the vision. In order for a vision to become a reality, there are certain elements that must be present.
Most importantly, the vision must be anchored in truth. If there is no or little truth, the vision will not be obtainable. For example: If a client says that she wants to be an opera singer despite the fact that she truly can't sing-can't carry a tune, has no pitch, etc. it's not impossible for her to achieve some level of singing ability with singing lessons. However, the struggle and the reality is so far fetched, that it really doesn't make sense to have this as an aspiration.
Accordingly, it would be important to find out just what she would hope to gain or could expect her life to be like as an opera singer. Upon investigation and exploration, it would be discovered that she loves to be on stage, get attention, and perform in some way. Those qualities can be used in many ways besides being an opera singer - and surely would be anchored more in truth.
It is also important that the vision is aligned with your purpose in life. If she wants to make this world a better place by sharing her talents and gifts, then singing would probably not be a wise choice. On the other hand, if she chooses some form of teaching and reaching many people so that she is sharing her ideas and wisdom, she's probably aligned with her purpose. Perhaps some form of public speaking might be more appropriate.
A vision must be exciting and compelling. If not, there is no incentive to take steps towards making it happen. If she chose to have a vision of becoming a nurse and caring for sick people when in fact, she doesn't particularly enjoy being around sick people, it's not going to pull her forward to wanting it to become a reality. In fact, there will most likely be lots of struggle and sabotaging along the way. Could it be a possible vision with truth? "Yes, but..." She could learn nursing and she could care for sick people, and it does align with her vision of sharing talents and gifts, BUT for her, it's not exciting or compelling. Therefore, the chances of her finishing the necessary course work aren't great and even if she did, it would feel more like drudgery.
So in creating a vision, it's important to think about what experience you would like to have. It would be helpful to notice and check if it's anchored in truth - for you. Does it align with your purpose? Is it compelling and exciting to you? Could it pull you forward and be an incentive and is it motivating you to wanting to take steps towards it?
Invitation to Experiment: Create a vision for your life. Include the type of experiences you want to have - include ALL of the elements possible: such as where you will be living, how you will be living, with whom, what type of work you'll be doing, etc. Don't leave anything out from your dream. Once it's crafted, look at the truth in it. Does it align with your truth? Look at your purpose for being on the planet. Does it align with your purpose? And lastly, is it exciting and compelling? Could it motivate and inspire you to take steps to move towards it? If so, take your first step, and then the next. It may at first seem like a pipe dream, but if it's aligned and compelling enough, it can become reality. You may modify your vision along the way, but all the while, you are moving towards a life that truly fits who you are and what you want.
Marion Franklin - is a Professional Certified Life Coach who coaches individuals and groups regarding personal and professional change, focus, human relations, and conflict management. Marion has coached managers at major corporations including PepsiCo, Toys'R'Us, and Reader's Digest. She conducts and help clients design workshops and presentations, has been a featured presenter at meetings, retreats, and an ongoing Women's Workshop Series, has been cited in The Journal News and The Wall Street Journal, and has appeared on local Cable Television. http://www.lifecoachinggroup.com
By definition, vision is a future orientation, a broad stroke picture that serves as the basis for making decisions or taking actions towards achieving the vision. In order for a vision to become a reality, there are certain elements that must be present.
Most importantly, the vision must be anchored in truth. If there is no or little truth, the vision will not be obtainable. For example: If a client says that she wants to be an opera singer despite the fact that she truly can't sing-can't carry a tune, has no pitch, etc. it's not impossible for her to achieve some level of singing ability with singing lessons. However, the struggle and the reality is so far fetched, that it really doesn't make sense to have this as an aspiration.
Accordingly, it would be important to find out just what she would hope to gain or could expect her life to be like as an opera singer. Upon investigation and exploration, it would be discovered that she loves to be on stage, get attention, and perform in some way. Those qualities can be used in many ways besides being an opera singer - and surely would be anchored more in truth.
It is also important that the vision is aligned with your purpose in life. If she wants to make this world a better place by sharing her talents and gifts, then singing would probably not be a wise choice. On the other hand, if she chooses some form of teaching and reaching many people so that she is sharing her ideas and wisdom, she's probably aligned with her purpose. Perhaps some form of public speaking might be more appropriate.
A vision must be exciting and compelling. If not, there is no incentive to take steps towards making it happen. If she chose to have a vision of becoming a nurse and caring for sick people when in fact, she doesn't particularly enjoy being around sick people, it's not going to pull her forward to wanting it to become a reality. In fact, there will most likely be lots of struggle and sabotaging along the way. Could it be a possible vision with truth? "Yes, but..." She could learn nursing and she could care for sick people, and it does align with her vision of sharing talents and gifts, BUT for her, it's not exciting or compelling. Therefore, the chances of her finishing the necessary course work aren't great and even if she did, it would feel more like drudgery.
So in creating a vision, it's important to think about what experience you would like to have. It would be helpful to notice and check if it's anchored in truth - for you. Does it align with your purpose? Is it compelling and exciting to you? Could it pull you forward and be an incentive and is it motivating you to wanting to take steps towards it?
Invitation to Experiment: Create a vision for your life. Include the type of experiences you want to have - include ALL of the elements possible: such as where you will be living, how you will be living, with whom, what type of work you'll be doing, etc. Don't leave anything out from your dream. Once it's crafted, look at the truth in it. Does it align with your truth? Look at your purpose for being on the planet. Does it align with your purpose? And lastly, is it exciting and compelling? Could it motivate and inspire you to take steps to move towards it? If so, take your first step, and then the next. It may at first seem like a pipe dream, but if it's aligned and compelling enough, it can become reality. You may modify your vision along the way, but all the while, you are moving towards a life that truly fits who you are and what you want.
Marion Franklin - is a Professional Certified Life Coach who coaches individuals and groups regarding personal and professional change, focus, human relations, and conflict management. Marion has coached managers at major corporations including PepsiCo, Toys'R'Us, and Reader's Digest. She conducts and help clients design workshops and presentations, has been a featured presenter at meetings, retreats, and an ongoing Women's Workshop Series, has been cited in The Journal News and The Wall Street Journal, and has appeared on local Cable Television. http://www.lifecoachinggroup.com
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Self-Improvement Secrets
* Perfectionism is a time waster.
Strive for excellence on important issues and ordinary best for everyday tasks. Do not waste your time on needless details.
* Be flexible.
Organize things the way they work for you. The principle of organizing is to be able to find what you want when you want it.
* Simplify.
No matter how much you seek change, it is impossible if there is no room for change. Busyness and over spending leaves you feeling overwhelmed, stressed and yearning for a simpler life. Letting go of clutter and attachments can be painful. Ask for help. Consider a trusted friend, family member or professional organizer who can keep you focused. (Telephone and email coaching are available. For more information contact: Judith@OrganizingResources.com)
* Clean out your closets.
Take time to remove what you no longer wear or use. Statistics show that we wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time. That means that there are a whole lot of clothes just waiting for the infrequent occasion to wear them. Do you really need to keep so many?
* Measure progress in terms of percentages.
The point of Self-Improvement is to increase your batting average. Changing a habit 10% of the time is a positive step in the right direction. Give yourself credit for the progress you are making. (Ty Cobb, baseball's legendary all-time leading hitter, had a lifetime batting average of 367, which means nearly five out of eight times at bat he made an out.)
* Treat yourself kindly.
Positive self-talk produces better results than degradation. ("I have missed more than 9000 shots in my career; I have lost almost 300 games; on 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot...and missed; I have failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed," states Michael Jordan, basketball's greatest.)
* Someone once said, "It is not how much you make that counts, it is how much you KEEP."
Pay attention to where you are spending and start a savings plan with spare change. It will mount up and your abundance will grow.
* Relax.
Stress depletes the immune system. Seek balance in your life and learn deep breathing exercises. Press your tongue onto the roof of your mouth and slowly breathe in through your nose continuing until you are fully inflated. Hold and notice how much oxygen you bring into your starving tissues. Release your breath by exhaling through your mouth. Repeat as often as necessary.
* Laugh.
Why does it feel so good to laugh? Because endorphins are released from the brain every time you do it. Endorphins have a morphine-like affect and are often referred to as the body's own opiates. Endorphin pushers: smiling and laughing, exercising, positive thinking, connecting with family and friends, celebrations, receiving recognition and experiencing nature up close and personal.
* Get a life!
This clichй is usually said with sarcasm. However, it is actually very good advice. Are you among the multitude that invests in an abundant lifestyle? Do you think you need that new car, boat or expensive vacation to feel successful? Would life be perfect if you had that new suit, a diamond ring or a bigger TV? Our homes have become a warehouse for possessions that enhance our lifestyle but fall short of enhancing our life.
* Choose to be happy.
Happiness is not found in ownership of material possessions. Rather, it comes from deep within. Each morning make a conscious decision to have a good day. Instead of waiting for things to get better, be grateful for what you already have. "Success is getting what you want; happiness is wanting what you get," stated Dale Carnegie, 1888-1955, American Author and Self-Improvement Trainer
Judith Kirk, owner of www.OrganizingResources.com provides coaching in simplification and organization mastery. She uses a holistic approach to teach life management skills and assures an immediate physical, emotional and psychological payoff when chaos and clutter are eliminated. The impact of simplifying and organizing renews the spirit and builds confidence. Order is the foundation upon which to build inner peace, contentment and joy in life. Subscribe to Free monthly newsletter at Newsletter@OrganizingResources.com.
Strive for excellence on important issues and ordinary best for everyday tasks. Do not waste your time on needless details.
* Be flexible.
Organize things the way they work for you. The principle of organizing is to be able to find what you want when you want it.
* Simplify.
No matter how much you seek change, it is impossible if there is no room for change. Busyness and over spending leaves you feeling overwhelmed, stressed and yearning for a simpler life. Letting go of clutter and attachments can be painful. Ask for help. Consider a trusted friend, family member or professional organizer who can keep you focused. (Telephone and email coaching are available. For more information contact: Judith@OrganizingResources.com)
* Clean out your closets.
Take time to remove what you no longer wear or use. Statistics show that we wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time. That means that there are a whole lot of clothes just waiting for the infrequent occasion to wear them. Do you really need to keep so many?
* Measure progress in terms of percentages.
The point of Self-Improvement is to increase your batting average. Changing a habit 10% of the time is a positive step in the right direction. Give yourself credit for the progress you are making. (Ty Cobb, baseball's legendary all-time leading hitter, had a lifetime batting average of 367, which means nearly five out of eight times at bat he made an out.)
* Treat yourself kindly.
Positive self-talk produces better results than degradation. ("I have missed more than 9000 shots in my career; I have lost almost 300 games; on 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot...and missed; I have failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed," states Michael Jordan, basketball's greatest.)
* Someone once said, "It is not how much you make that counts, it is how much you KEEP."
Pay attention to where you are spending and start a savings plan with spare change. It will mount up and your abundance will grow.
* Relax.
Stress depletes the immune system. Seek balance in your life and learn deep breathing exercises. Press your tongue onto the roof of your mouth and slowly breathe in through your nose continuing until you are fully inflated. Hold and notice how much oxygen you bring into your starving tissues. Release your breath by exhaling through your mouth. Repeat as often as necessary.
* Laugh.
Why does it feel so good to laugh? Because endorphins are released from the brain every time you do it. Endorphins have a morphine-like affect and are often referred to as the body's own opiates. Endorphin pushers: smiling and laughing, exercising, positive thinking, connecting with family and friends, celebrations, receiving recognition and experiencing nature up close and personal.
* Get a life!
This clichй is usually said with sarcasm. However, it is actually very good advice. Are you among the multitude that invests in an abundant lifestyle? Do you think you need that new car, boat or expensive vacation to feel successful? Would life be perfect if you had that new suit, a diamond ring or a bigger TV? Our homes have become a warehouse for possessions that enhance our lifestyle but fall short of enhancing our life.
* Choose to be happy.
Happiness is not found in ownership of material possessions. Rather, it comes from deep within. Each morning make a conscious decision to have a good day. Instead of waiting for things to get better, be grateful for what you already have. "Success is getting what you want; happiness is wanting what you get," stated Dale Carnegie, 1888-1955, American Author and Self-Improvement Trainer
Judith Kirk, owner of www.OrganizingResources.com provides coaching in simplification and organization mastery. She uses a holistic approach to teach life management skills and assures an immediate physical, emotional and psychological payoff when chaos and clutter are eliminated. The impact of simplifying and organizing renews the spirit and builds confidence. Order is the foundation upon which to build inner peace, contentment and joy in life. Subscribe to Free monthly newsletter at Newsletter@OrganizingResources.com.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Wait, Thats Not on the Map
Back from my amazing summer excursion, a month long drive through Spain! Well, I mean, I didn't do any of the driving, my partner did. See, I only know how to drive an automatic and since we have a stick here in Belgium, my partner kindly agreed to do all the driving. In total it ended up being close to 5000 kilometers and he did beautifully without so much as a complaint. Nice, huh?
My part in this adventure was to be the navigator. A role that I take with great relish and responsibility! I had my several large maps along with the trip planner for each leg printed out from the internet. I would sit in the passenger seat with the big detail map open on my lap and the turn by turn internet guide at close reach (oh, and I was also in charge of the CD's - but I digress).
Everything all prepared for, right? No surprises, right? Well, not exactly. While we were totally prepped about 80% of the time, there were still a few glitches. Occasionally, the signs on the roads - I mean even the road numbers - were different than what they were supposed to be. We would be going along just fine and then everything would change suddenly and without warning. No names or directions or numbers matched anything remotely familiar. I, of course, went into a tizzy. Flipping pages, shuffling papers, barking at Brad all because I was venturing into uncharted territory.
I mean I was ticked! This was absolutely not the way it was supposed to be. Those silly traffic people putting up these confusing signs - I mean, didn't they know what I needed? Thus I began the "blame game" - the stupid internet map people, the stupid sign people, the stupid government and finally, stupid me. (Hmmm, coaching opportunity here? Read on.)
Then there was the event of entering a new city for the first time. More often than not, while our maps were terrific they did not give the detail that we needed in each individual city to be able to totally navigate where we wanted to go. The internet map was our savior here, but still... in every city the street signs were in different places and the names for the streets weren't always what we were expecting. Picture this: two guys and their dog, in some big city in Spain circling on one of those "roundabouts" over and over trying to figure out which off-shoot we should take and which direction all the while dodging incoming and out going drivers who grew up on these roads and are late for work. I hope that image makes you smile, it does me - at least now looking back.
Inevitably, we always made it to our destination and usually without a hitch. In fact sometimes, when things would look hopeless and nothing was familiar, we would wander and see what came up and strangely enough all of a sudden we would be right where we needed to be and in a better spot than we could have ever planned with all the maps in the world.
I learned several things from this that actually shook me up a bit. Here are a few of the lessons that I got:
If you stare at the route on the map too much you miss some amazing scenery.
Most of the time, the signs are very clear and point you in the direction of the destination. When they don't, you can choose to a) get all agitated and scared fearing that you might "fall of the edge of the earth," or b) adventure into the unknown, look for things you recognize and back track when necessary - remember the world won't come to an end.
When you are stuck on a roundabout and you feel the pressure of everyone else zipping in and out on familiar territory, remember that a) with time, this can become familiar territory for you too; b) the roundabout is there to help you get where you want to go; c) after a couple spins around, make a decision and go for it - after all you can always back track!
New situations can be disorienting. Accept that and relax into the adventure as best you can.
Learn to drive a stick when you are young - not profound but simply the truth!
Next time we will talk about the joys of wandering and finding unexpected gems! Below you will find some experiments to help you enjoy the journey more and worry less!
Some Experiments
Are you so focused on the "route" and how you will get to your goals that you lose sight of the scenery around you? Plan for the future with focus and determination but LIVE in the moment. Journal regularly on what is happening now and pick out the special lessons that you learn on the way to your goals. Often they are more valuable than the goal itself.
When things aren't as they should be what or who do you blame? Circumstances, others, situations, even yourself? Sure there are reasons and explanations that we can use to learn for the future but sometimes we use blame as an excuse to stay suck right where we are. What if for this month you promised not to blame anyone of anything? Instead, all you did was use your non-judgmental self to collect the information that comes in and then made a choice. Look and see what kind of freedom that gives you and keep a journal to see the results.
What lessons do YOU see for yourself that come up around this article? Put together a program for this month that is tailor made to what you need to learn. E-mail me what exercise you come up with.
© 2004 by Roger DeWitt & Life Artistry Coaching. Roger is a certified life and business coach working with people to change their thinking so they can change their lives! Sign up for his monthly "5 Minute Success Tips" at www.lifeartistrycoaching.com
My part in this adventure was to be the navigator. A role that I take with great relish and responsibility! I had my several large maps along with the trip planner for each leg printed out from the internet. I would sit in the passenger seat with the big detail map open on my lap and the turn by turn internet guide at close reach (oh, and I was also in charge of the CD's - but I digress).
Everything all prepared for, right? No surprises, right? Well, not exactly. While we were totally prepped about 80% of the time, there were still a few glitches. Occasionally, the signs on the roads - I mean even the road numbers - were different than what they were supposed to be. We would be going along just fine and then everything would change suddenly and without warning. No names or directions or numbers matched anything remotely familiar. I, of course, went into a tizzy. Flipping pages, shuffling papers, barking at Brad all because I was venturing into uncharted territory.
I mean I was ticked! This was absolutely not the way it was supposed to be. Those silly traffic people putting up these confusing signs - I mean, didn't they know what I needed? Thus I began the "blame game" - the stupid internet map people, the stupid sign people, the stupid government and finally, stupid me. (Hmmm, coaching opportunity here? Read on.)
Then there was the event of entering a new city for the first time. More often than not, while our maps were terrific they did not give the detail that we needed in each individual city to be able to totally navigate where we wanted to go. The internet map was our savior here, but still... in every city the street signs were in different places and the names for the streets weren't always what we were expecting. Picture this: two guys and their dog, in some big city in Spain circling on one of those "roundabouts" over and over trying to figure out which off-shoot we should take and which direction all the while dodging incoming and out going drivers who grew up on these roads and are late for work. I hope that image makes you smile, it does me - at least now looking back.
Inevitably, we always made it to our destination and usually without a hitch. In fact sometimes, when things would look hopeless and nothing was familiar, we would wander and see what came up and strangely enough all of a sudden we would be right where we needed to be and in a better spot than we could have ever planned with all the maps in the world.
I learned several things from this that actually shook me up a bit. Here are a few of the lessons that I got:
If you stare at the route on the map too much you miss some amazing scenery.
Most of the time, the signs are very clear and point you in the direction of the destination. When they don't, you can choose to a) get all agitated and scared fearing that you might "fall of the edge of the earth," or b) adventure into the unknown, look for things you recognize and back track when necessary - remember the world won't come to an end.
When you are stuck on a roundabout and you feel the pressure of everyone else zipping in and out on familiar territory, remember that a) with time, this can become familiar territory for you too; b) the roundabout is there to help you get where you want to go; c) after a couple spins around, make a decision and go for it - after all you can always back track!
New situations can be disorienting. Accept that and relax into the adventure as best you can.
Learn to drive a stick when you are young - not profound but simply the truth!
Next time we will talk about the joys of wandering and finding unexpected gems! Below you will find some experiments to help you enjoy the journey more and worry less!
Some Experiments
Are you so focused on the "route" and how you will get to your goals that you lose sight of the scenery around you? Plan for the future with focus and determination but LIVE in the moment. Journal regularly on what is happening now and pick out the special lessons that you learn on the way to your goals. Often they are more valuable than the goal itself.
When things aren't as they should be what or who do you blame? Circumstances, others, situations, even yourself? Sure there are reasons and explanations that we can use to learn for the future but sometimes we use blame as an excuse to stay suck right where we are. What if for this month you promised not to blame anyone of anything? Instead, all you did was use your non-judgmental self to collect the information that comes in and then made a choice. Look and see what kind of freedom that gives you and keep a journal to see the results.
What lessons do YOU see for yourself that come up around this article? Put together a program for this month that is tailor made to what you need to learn. E-mail me what exercise you come up with.
© 2004 by Roger DeWitt & Life Artistry Coaching. Roger is a certified life and business coach working with people to change their thinking so they can change their lives! Sign up for his monthly "5 Minute Success Tips" at www.lifeartistrycoaching.com
Friday, October 2, 2009
Creating A Life You Love
Imagine that right now, right here, today? there is within your grasp not one but several opportunities to redesign specific aspects of your life so that the sum total is a life you absolutely love. Then imagine that the only thing standing between you and your opportunities is a closed mind, fear, habits, concern, worry, drama, or perhaps mental, physical, and emotional clutter. Do you know what a default is? It's what you get when you don't choose to get something else and for most of us a default life is average and mediocre with sprinkles of joy in between. A default life is living for the weekend. A default like is hanging on 'til retirement. A default life is waiting for the kids to grow up, move out, and finish college. A default life is waiting, and waiting, and waiting for things to get better someday?one day.
Most people don't accidentally have a great life, a great job, a great marriage, a great body, or great children. I don't know about you but I am not touched, moved, or inspired by mediocrity. I don't aspire to live an average life, with an average job, and celebrate twenty-something anniversaries in an average marriage. My spirit longs for relationships and experiences that cause me to love deeply, grow profoundly, and see the magnificence in all of life. I can't have that kind of life if I am settling for the default. My name is Robin Harris and I am a coach, an author, a certified Highlands Natural Abilities Counsultant, and I am the CEO of DesignerLife, a transformational business dedicated to helping individuals live by design; not by default. And today I just want to talk to you about designing a life you absolutely love. I call it the DesignerLife.
What's a DesignerLife? Think of a piece of art that is not only beautiful but extremely functional. Just like a beautiful warm and cozy home provides sanctuary and focus for a family, a DesignerLife provides sanctuary and focus for the soul. Just like each room in that house has its own motif and purpose, each area of the DesignerLife has its own motif and purpose. Just like all of the rooms together, even the hallways and pantry make up the house, all of the areas of our lives make up the DesignerLife. A DesignerLife has been lovingly designed and architected to honor your best and your highest good and it includes spiritual hallways and pantries, too. Mmm, it sounds wonderful, doesn't it?
I want you to consider a show home that has never been lived in. Everything is just so beautifully pristine and sterile. That's because it's for show but when the family moves in they bring their energy, their style, their nuances, their touch and the house becomes a home. It's not perfect?but it is. It's not immaculate buts it's naturally inviting. The DesignerLife is a life you design that is natural, expanding, and very, very inviting not only to you but to other sojourners, also. We have so long been looking to the system, the companies we work for, the businesses we have built, the country we live in to sustain our way of life. Today is a new day, and the comfort of what we knew has passed away, it's time to excavate, renovate, and develop our most precious resources: our soul's dreams, our natural gifts, and our talents. It's time for us to evolve to the next level and some sojourners are going to go kicking and screaming, and some won't go at all. You probably thought the creation was completed millions of years ago, oh no. Human's are still in process and every so often life says "hold on, wait a minute, it's time to shift and leap baby". You can plod along for only so long before life demands that you run fast or get eaten. The new paradigm is not for survivors, it's for thrivers; people who are ready to unleash their potential into the world.
You see, the magnificent being that you are is not your doing. You didn't design it, you didn't create it, so there no reason to be arrogant about it. It's a gift. Don't just say thank you. Gratitude is only the beginning, there's also a measure of responsibility and accountability that fall on the shoulders of the gifted. And we all are gifted. It is our responsibility to nurture our magnificence, to develop it, and express it profoundly in the world that we live in. Your magnificence is not only going to give you a life you love, it's going to touch, move and inspire others. Divine intention will have your be great in ways you cannot even imagine. Divine intention will have your biggest mistakes sow seeds of wisdom and contribution to other. Divine intention will have you become the student and the teacher in life's next evolution. The next evolution will have human beings manifest the Creator's abundant, loving, creative nature.
What would it look like to have a life you absolutely love? When you really think about it, I mean see it with your minds eye, in living Technicolor, it should be so awesome it sends chills up your spine. I'm not talking about a superficial life where people are pretending to be happy, pretending that the marriage is working, pretending that the kids aren't driving them crazy, pretending that life is in order when chaos is actually the king. I'm not talking about having more, more, more while feeling less, less, less. I'm talking about a life where your soul is satisfied. This is a life where you have peace of mind, finances in order, and a healthy mind, body, and spirit. This is a life with relationships that inspire and stimulate you, intimacy that heals and thrills you, and family and community for mutual love and support. This is a life complete with meaningful and fulfilling work that uses your gifts and talents and honors your uniqueness. This is a life where there is adequate time for self-nourishment, self-investment, fun and relaxation. And? this is a life where you receive an abundance of joy by contributing to the well being of others who are on the planet with you now, as well as those who will be coming in the future.
I can't tell you the details of your DesignerLife. I can't tell you how living a life you absolutely love will show up for you. I only know that the process of designing that kind of life will rock your world. I know somebody out there is saying, pfff you must be dreaming? and my response is "yes, and your point is?"
You see if it were left up to the practical people, the realists of the world, we'd still be huddled in a cold cave without a fire to warm us. I'm not just a dreamer, oh no: I'm a possibility chick with a plan. You see a designer life is not just about dreaming about it, thinking about it, longing for it, hoping for it, praying for it. A DesignerLife is about intention; the kind of intention that produces action, the kind of action that produces results.
The road less traveled is full of uncertainty, but the other road, the popular one can only take you where you've already been. Having an extraordinary life, a life you absolutely love is gonna seem like way too much work to the average person. It's not going to appeal to the person courting mediocrity. It's not going to excite the person who is content with waiting for some day, one day. It doesn't call to the practical or the realist. So if you fall into one of these categories, cover your ears cause this message isn't for you. I'm talking to the people who caught a glimpse of possibility for their own life, for the sojourners who are ready to unleash their potential out in the real world, and for the people who can't stand the thought of settling for the default life.
The message I want to bring to you is simple. Your most challenging obstacle is not the present or past circumstances of your life, the things you did or didn't do, it's not your age, your gender, your race, it's not the naysayers or critics or the practical realist who are convinced your dreams and aspirations are a waste of time, oh these are all challenges to be dealt with on their own terms but by far the biggest challenge you will face is your own self doubt, lack of commitment, and fear. Getting over yourself is the single most forwarding action you can take to move toward your own magnificence. I want to ask you for a huge favor and here it is?Get over yourself and just be magnificent.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach who work with client's who are ready to live by design; not by default. Contact Robin via web site www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com.
Most people don't accidentally have a great life, a great job, a great marriage, a great body, or great children. I don't know about you but I am not touched, moved, or inspired by mediocrity. I don't aspire to live an average life, with an average job, and celebrate twenty-something anniversaries in an average marriage. My spirit longs for relationships and experiences that cause me to love deeply, grow profoundly, and see the magnificence in all of life. I can't have that kind of life if I am settling for the default. My name is Robin Harris and I am a coach, an author, a certified Highlands Natural Abilities Counsultant, and I am the CEO of DesignerLife, a transformational business dedicated to helping individuals live by design; not by default. And today I just want to talk to you about designing a life you absolutely love. I call it the DesignerLife.
What's a DesignerLife? Think of a piece of art that is not only beautiful but extremely functional. Just like a beautiful warm and cozy home provides sanctuary and focus for a family, a DesignerLife provides sanctuary and focus for the soul. Just like each room in that house has its own motif and purpose, each area of the DesignerLife has its own motif and purpose. Just like all of the rooms together, even the hallways and pantry make up the house, all of the areas of our lives make up the DesignerLife. A DesignerLife has been lovingly designed and architected to honor your best and your highest good and it includes spiritual hallways and pantries, too. Mmm, it sounds wonderful, doesn't it?
I want you to consider a show home that has never been lived in. Everything is just so beautifully pristine and sterile. That's because it's for show but when the family moves in they bring their energy, their style, their nuances, their touch and the house becomes a home. It's not perfect?but it is. It's not immaculate buts it's naturally inviting. The DesignerLife is a life you design that is natural, expanding, and very, very inviting not only to you but to other sojourners, also. We have so long been looking to the system, the companies we work for, the businesses we have built, the country we live in to sustain our way of life. Today is a new day, and the comfort of what we knew has passed away, it's time to excavate, renovate, and develop our most precious resources: our soul's dreams, our natural gifts, and our talents. It's time for us to evolve to the next level and some sojourners are going to go kicking and screaming, and some won't go at all. You probably thought the creation was completed millions of years ago, oh no. Human's are still in process and every so often life says "hold on, wait a minute, it's time to shift and leap baby". You can plod along for only so long before life demands that you run fast or get eaten. The new paradigm is not for survivors, it's for thrivers; people who are ready to unleash their potential into the world.
You see, the magnificent being that you are is not your doing. You didn't design it, you didn't create it, so there no reason to be arrogant about it. It's a gift. Don't just say thank you. Gratitude is only the beginning, there's also a measure of responsibility and accountability that fall on the shoulders of the gifted. And we all are gifted. It is our responsibility to nurture our magnificence, to develop it, and express it profoundly in the world that we live in. Your magnificence is not only going to give you a life you love, it's going to touch, move and inspire others. Divine intention will have your be great in ways you cannot even imagine. Divine intention will have your biggest mistakes sow seeds of wisdom and contribution to other. Divine intention will have you become the student and the teacher in life's next evolution. The next evolution will have human beings manifest the Creator's abundant, loving, creative nature.
What would it look like to have a life you absolutely love? When you really think about it, I mean see it with your minds eye, in living Technicolor, it should be so awesome it sends chills up your spine. I'm not talking about a superficial life where people are pretending to be happy, pretending that the marriage is working, pretending that the kids aren't driving them crazy, pretending that life is in order when chaos is actually the king. I'm not talking about having more, more, more while feeling less, less, less. I'm talking about a life where your soul is satisfied. This is a life where you have peace of mind, finances in order, and a healthy mind, body, and spirit. This is a life with relationships that inspire and stimulate you, intimacy that heals and thrills you, and family and community for mutual love and support. This is a life complete with meaningful and fulfilling work that uses your gifts and talents and honors your uniqueness. This is a life where there is adequate time for self-nourishment, self-investment, fun and relaxation. And? this is a life where you receive an abundance of joy by contributing to the well being of others who are on the planet with you now, as well as those who will be coming in the future.
I can't tell you the details of your DesignerLife. I can't tell you how living a life you absolutely love will show up for you. I only know that the process of designing that kind of life will rock your world. I know somebody out there is saying, pfff you must be dreaming? and my response is "yes, and your point is?"
You see if it were left up to the practical people, the realists of the world, we'd still be huddled in a cold cave without a fire to warm us. I'm not just a dreamer, oh no: I'm a possibility chick with a plan. You see a designer life is not just about dreaming about it, thinking about it, longing for it, hoping for it, praying for it. A DesignerLife is about intention; the kind of intention that produces action, the kind of action that produces results.
The road less traveled is full of uncertainty, but the other road, the popular one can only take you where you've already been. Having an extraordinary life, a life you absolutely love is gonna seem like way too much work to the average person. It's not going to appeal to the person courting mediocrity. It's not going to excite the person who is content with waiting for some day, one day. It doesn't call to the practical or the realist. So if you fall into one of these categories, cover your ears cause this message isn't for you. I'm talking to the people who caught a glimpse of possibility for their own life, for the sojourners who are ready to unleash their potential out in the real world, and for the people who can't stand the thought of settling for the default life.
The message I want to bring to you is simple. Your most challenging obstacle is not the present or past circumstances of your life, the things you did or didn't do, it's not your age, your gender, your race, it's not the naysayers or critics or the practical realist who are convinced your dreams and aspirations are a waste of time, oh these are all challenges to be dealt with on their own terms but by far the biggest challenge you will face is your own self doubt, lack of commitment, and fear. Getting over yourself is the single most forwarding action you can take to move toward your own magnificence. I want to ask you for a huge favor and here it is?Get over yourself and just be magnificent.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach who work with client's who are ready to live by design; not by default. Contact Robin via web site www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com.
Monday, September 28, 2009
How To Use The Past, Future, And Present In Attaining Success
Did you know that your past, present, and future can affect
directly or indirectly your outlook in life?
THE PAST
Have you ever done something that is so regrettable you couldn't
forgive yourself? Have you ever made a mistake that up to the
present time you're still blaming yourself? Are you still torturing
yourself with the thought that only if you could've done it
differently, you're living a much better life right now?
Good news for you! You don't have to keep this burden in your heart
for as long as you live. Release it. Set yourself free.
If you keep bad memories, you're depriving yourself of good mental
and emotional health. You're making yourself a prisoner of the past.
This will adversely affect your capacity to act at the present moment.
You will not be able to think clearly and you will lose your focus
if you are still lingering in the shadows of your dark past.
No matter what you do, you couldn't reverse or otherwise change
history. So let bygones be bygones. Why worry about something you
have no control of?
Let go of the past, but keep the LESSONS. Whatever lesson you've
learned will be of utmost importance to the fulfillment of your goals
in the future. These lessons are your mentors that may sometimes
teach you the hard way; but nevertheless, success comes to those
who are willing to take the risk and pay the price for their actions.
And what about the successes you had in the past? How did you feel
when you've accomplished something exceptional? It feels great isn't
it?
Well then , use these past experiences in your present endeavors
to encourage you and to motivate you. These memorable experiences
will bring a positive aura of enthusiasm and will remind you that
you have the power to achieve anything with the right attitude.
Recall these affirmative memories in everything that you do and you
will see amazing results in all your undertakings.
THE FUTURE
Now how can the future influence your success if it hasn't occurred yet?
The answer is simple.
Your burning passion to attain your ideal life in the future will become
the motivating factor that will prod and push you to take the essential
steps at the present moment.
Conceive your future in the most vivid and comprehensive way possible.
For instance, if you want to get rich, then take into consideration:
1) How much money you desire to make, when you intend to get them,
and your action plan to have that exact amount by your target date;
2) The vision of your lifestyle when you've attained the money; like the
people you are in contact with, the activities you are engaging in, the
food you are eating, the places you are visiting...Well, you get the
picture.
These are the guiding forces that will chart the right path to your
intended destination. If you envision yourself as having attained them
and focus all your efforts regardless of the impending obstacles ahead,
then your inner power will release the right kind of energy that will
enable you to do nearly anything in pursuit of your desired end.
THE PRESENT
The present moment is the time to ACT. Ready or not, you must do some
action now! Mistakes will be made, but you could always revise them.
Put procrastination aside. One delay or excuse will generate a chain
reaction of more postponements and alibis that will never end. Before
you knew it, open opportunities have already passed you by.
Never let fear get on your way. Some people are struck by the threats
of failures, setbacks, or criticisms. What they don't realize is that
majority of successful people had to pass through "the eye of the needle"
in order to get where they are now.
Act intelligently. Use your past mistakes as guides to avoid future
blunders. Let the vision of your ideal life in the future compel you to
carry out your plans and catapult you to reach your deepest desires.
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion
Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships,
multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all
the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
directly or indirectly your outlook in life?
THE PAST
Have you ever done something that is so regrettable you couldn't
forgive yourself? Have you ever made a mistake that up to the
present time you're still blaming yourself? Are you still torturing
yourself with the thought that only if you could've done it
differently, you're living a much better life right now?
Good news for you! You don't have to keep this burden in your heart
for as long as you live. Release it. Set yourself free.
If you keep bad memories, you're depriving yourself of good mental
and emotional health. You're making yourself a prisoner of the past.
This will adversely affect your capacity to act at the present moment.
You will not be able to think clearly and you will lose your focus
if you are still lingering in the shadows of your dark past.
No matter what you do, you couldn't reverse or otherwise change
history. So let bygones be bygones. Why worry about something you
have no control of?
Let go of the past, but keep the LESSONS. Whatever lesson you've
learned will be of utmost importance to the fulfillment of your goals
in the future. These lessons are your mentors that may sometimes
teach you the hard way; but nevertheless, success comes to those
who are willing to take the risk and pay the price for their actions.
And what about the successes you had in the past? How did you feel
when you've accomplished something exceptional? It feels great isn't
it?
Well then , use these past experiences in your present endeavors
to encourage you and to motivate you. These memorable experiences
will bring a positive aura of enthusiasm and will remind you that
you have the power to achieve anything with the right attitude.
Recall these affirmative memories in everything that you do and you
will see amazing results in all your undertakings.
THE FUTURE
Now how can the future influence your success if it hasn't occurred yet?
The answer is simple.
Your burning passion to attain your ideal life in the future will become
the motivating factor that will prod and push you to take the essential
steps at the present moment.
Conceive your future in the most vivid and comprehensive way possible.
For instance, if you want to get rich, then take into consideration:
1) How much money you desire to make, when you intend to get them,
and your action plan to have that exact amount by your target date;
2) The vision of your lifestyle when you've attained the money; like the
people you are in contact with, the activities you are engaging in, the
food you are eating, the places you are visiting...Well, you get the
picture.
These are the guiding forces that will chart the right path to your
intended destination. If you envision yourself as having attained them
and focus all your efforts regardless of the impending obstacles ahead,
then your inner power will release the right kind of energy that will
enable you to do nearly anything in pursuit of your desired end.
THE PRESENT
The present moment is the time to ACT. Ready or not, you must do some
action now! Mistakes will be made, but you could always revise them.
Put procrastination aside. One delay or excuse will generate a chain
reaction of more postponements and alibis that will never end. Before
you knew it, open opportunities have already passed you by.
Never let fear get on your way. Some people are struck by the threats
of failures, setbacks, or criticisms. What they don't realize is that
majority of successful people had to pass through "the eye of the needle"
in order to get where they are now.
Act intelligently. Use your past mistakes as guides to avoid future
blunders. Let the vision of your ideal life in the future compel you to
carry out your plans and catapult you to reach your deepest desires.
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion
Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships,
multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all
the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Live Your Life To The Fullest
Do you sometimes feel that you're living a boring life? You
just can't seem to find anything exciting.
You wake up in the morning, then do the same old rituals.
You go to the office or to school. You meet the same people,
do the same job, travel the same road, booooring. Next
day, same story.
Do you want a change in your life? The solution is YOU!
You're the master of your destiny. You decide if you want
to have a change or not.
Take the situation of a high school graduate. He have 2
choices - to continue through college or earn money working
as a clerk.
He's intimidated by the difficulties of studying, thesis, etc.
He doesn't think he will pass the exams because he thinks he's
below average. He doesn't like to take the risk of failing
college and earning no money at present.
So he works as a clerk earning meager income. He's happy
because he's earning money at such a young age while his
friends are having a hard time.
But then his friends graduated and got high-paying jobs. He
envies them. If only he have sacrificed a few years and
faced all the challenges of college, then he could've had
a better life. If only he had taken the risk!
There are also some people who want to improve their lives,
but they're just too afraid to come out of their comfort
zones and explore the endless opportunities out there.
Yes, there may be challenges and problems; but if you try
your best to move forward, you'll get more out of life.
Explore and diversify. Take a different route to work,
eat exotic foods you've never tasted, do something
outrageous (not dangerous).
Life could be exciting. It's your choice. Are you
satisfied with your life right now? If not, then you
need to do the things that you think will make your
life complete and meaningful.
You've got only one life to live. Maximize every opportunity.
Go out and do those things which will leave lasting memories
in your mind. Live every day as if it's your last.
Seize every moment!
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion
Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships,
multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all
the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
just can't seem to find anything exciting.
You wake up in the morning, then do the same old rituals.
You go to the office or to school. You meet the same people,
do the same job, travel the same road, booooring. Next
day, same story.
Do you want a change in your life? The solution is YOU!
You're the master of your destiny. You decide if you want
to have a change or not.
Take the situation of a high school graduate. He have 2
choices - to continue through college or earn money working
as a clerk.
He's intimidated by the difficulties of studying, thesis, etc.
He doesn't think he will pass the exams because he thinks he's
below average. He doesn't like to take the risk of failing
college and earning no money at present.
So he works as a clerk earning meager income. He's happy
because he's earning money at such a young age while his
friends are having a hard time.
But then his friends graduated and got high-paying jobs. He
envies them. If only he have sacrificed a few years and
faced all the challenges of college, then he could've had
a better life. If only he had taken the risk!
There are also some people who want to improve their lives,
but they're just too afraid to come out of their comfort
zones and explore the endless opportunities out there.
Yes, there may be challenges and problems; but if you try
your best to move forward, you'll get more out of life.
Explore and diversify. Take a different route to work,
eat exotic foods you've never tasted, do something
outrageous (not dangerous).
Life could be exciting. It's your choice. Are you
satisfied with your life right now? If not, then you
need to do the things that you think will make your
life complete and meaningful.
You've got only one life to live. Maximize every opportunity.
Go out and do those things which will leave lasting memories
in your mind. Live every day as if it's your last.
Seize every moment!
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion
Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships,
multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all
the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Control Your Fear Before It Controls You
"Fear Factor" is one of my favorite TV shows. It
highlights the courage of the participants to engage in
the most fearsome and disgusting acts.
Most of the contestants are willing to sacrifice their
dignity for the sake of the prize money. So what does
that imply? It implies that with the proper mindset,
determination, and will power, you can conquer your fear.
Everyone has some sort of fear. It may be brought about
by any one or more of the following reasons.
1) by a traumatic past incident (like being bitten by a
dog)
2) by the influence of other people
3) by their own negative way of thinking
But are you going to let fear take over your life? Will
you remain a hostage of your fear forever?
You must take the necessary steps to overcome your fright.
It's all in the mind.
Do you envy other people when you see them enjoying wild
rides, and you're just stuck in a corner because you're
too terrified to give it a try?
My suggestion is to face your fear head-on. Imagine
yourself enjoying the experience instead of exaggerating
the things that make you worry. (Unless of course you
have health problems, then taking wild rides may not be
a good idea).
Do you want to be a doctor but you're afraid that your
intellect can't handle the pressure or you're worried
about financial insecurity?
Well here's the good news. If you're really determined
to achieve your deepest desires, a powerful force will
enable you to reach them amidst every obstacle that comes
in the way. I'm not kidding.
Someone or something will always be there to help you
attain your goals. Just have faith in your abilities.
Your will power have the utmost capacity to accomplish
anything with the proper mindset.
You could use visualization to help you in defeating
any kind of fear.
Are you afraid of heights? Then imagine yourself being on
top of a mountain, overseeing the magnificent sights. Enjoy
and feel the moment. Take away all worries and anxieties.
Then just do it! Face it head on! Go to the top of a
building and savor the great feeling of being able to
face your fear.
This applies to whatever thing that triggers your fear
factor. Just imagine being able to defeat it, then
confront it with the definite belief that you have the
capacity to do everything you want if you just put your
mind to it.
Face the thing you fear the most and you'll never have to
fear anything again in your life.
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships, multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
highlights the courage of the participants to engage in
the most fearsome and disgusting acts.
Most of the contestants are willing to sacrifice their
dignity for the sake of the prize money. So what does
that imply? It implies that with the proper mindset,
determination, and will power, you can conquer your fear.
Everyone has some sort of fear. It may be brought about
by any one or more of the following reasons.
1) by a traumatic past incident (like being bitten by a
dog)
2) by the influence of other people
3) by their own negative way of thinking
But are you going to let fear take over your life? Will
you remain a hostage of your fear forever?
You must take the necessary steps to overcome your fright.
It's all in the mind.
Do you envy other people when you see them enjoying wild
rides, and you're just stuck in a corner because you're
too terrified to give it a try?
My suggestion is to face your fear head-on. Imagine
yourself enjoying the experience instead of exaggerating
the things that make you worry. (Unless of course you
have health problems, then taking wild rides may not be
a good idea).
Do you want to be a doctor but you're afraid that your
intellect can't handle the pressure or you're worried
about financial insecurity?
Well here's the good news. If you're really determined
to achieve your deepest desires, a powerful force will
enable you to reach them amidst every obstacle that comes
in the way. I'm not kidding.
Someone or something will always be there to help you
attain your goals. Just have faith in your abilities.
Your will power have the utmost capacity to accomplish
anything with the proper mindset.
You could use visualization to help you in defeating
any kind of fear.
Are you afraid of heights? Then imagine yourself being on
top of a mountain, overseeing the magnificent sights. Enjoy
and feel the moment. Take away all worries and anxieties.
Then just do it! Face it head on! Go to the top of a
building and savor the great feeling of being able to
face your fear.
This applies to whatever thing that triggers your fear
factor. Just imagine being able to defeat it, then
confront it with the definite belief that you have the
capacity to do everything you want if you just put your
mind to it.
Face the thing you fear the most and you'll never have to
fear anything again in your life.
Michael Lee is the author of "How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion Wizard," an ebook designed to fully improve your relationships, multiply your profits, win negotiations, and help you attain all the desired freedom and power you could ever dream of. Go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now and grab a sample chapter.
Monday, September 21, 2009
The Gravitational Pull of ANTs, WORMS & FEARS
What is an ANT?
An ANT is an acronym for Automatic Negative Thoughts.
What is a WORM?
A WORM is a metaphor for deep-seated, unconscious beliefs that lye dormant in our consciousness analogous to a computer virus that only activates when a certain button is pushed on our keyboard.
What is a FEAR?
A FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real; an optical illusion that makes you believe it is impossible to move beyond this point so why even try. FEAR is a lie!
ANTs are pre-conscious thoughts, beliefs, ideas that keep us trapped in our comfort zone. They exist to stop us from moving to far ahead of our current environment. They cause us to become uncomfortable with our potential and possibility.
They exist to keep us in a holding pattern where we don't act or do anything to better ourselves. They keep us stagnated and stifled. They cause us to sabotage our good.
WORMS are much stronger than ANTs and are more insidious and pervasive. If we are focused, we can overcome an ANT with sheer will power, but will power up against a WORM [deep seated, dominant belief] is like one soldier up against an entire army. A WORM will destroy will power and we will automatically sabotage our life and act in a manner consistent with our dominant beliefs.
For instance, we might have an ANT that says, "I'm not good enough to be with this person." If we force our way through that automatic negative thought using shear will power and continue to stay in the relationship, the ANT may be crushed but then the WORM will appear and may say, "You ARE NOT good enough to be with that person so why are you trying - LOSER!" At that moment when the unconscious, dominant belief has you in its grips, you will begin to slowly or abruptly (depending on frequency) sabotage the relationship in some shape, form or fashion.
The Law of Attraction
The law of attraction simply means that you attract in life what you are not what you want and what you are is what you think about when you are not thinking about anything. The law of attraction states who you are - your dominant beliefs and unconscious thoughts; i.e., DNA (see SHOCKphilosophy? Principle #4) -- ANTs, WORMS and FEARS.
I am sure you have heard the term, like attracts like. It's the reason why rich people hang out with rich people and poor people hang out with poor people. What we must be mindful of is our DNA programming is designed not to go outside of its comfort zone for extended periods of time. With that said, it's understandable why we feel uncomfortable when we are around something or someone we have never been exposed to that stretches us, challenges us to be more, do more and having more. So it is our DNA programming; ANTs, WOMRS, and FEARS that keep us locked into this vicious cycle that gives the illusion of progression when in fact we are on auto-repeat; just standing still. We then attract people, places and things in our life to confirm this process and keep us in a holding pattern.
The law of attraction is so powerful that if you had two pianos in different rooms and struck the c-note on the first piano the other piano's c-chord would be vibrating as well. The law of attraction is gravitational which is why in order to move to the next quantum or level in life we must first move and expand our consciousness so that we can attract a different outcome.
In order to move from one gravitational pull to another, we must become comfortable with being uncomfortable, face our ANTs, WORMS and FEARS and learn how to handle next level thinking. When you expand consciousness, expand spiritually, emotionally and psychologically, you automatically move into another vibration or gravitational pull. You will also bring along with you for the ride and new set of ANTs, WORMS and FEARS whose soul purpose is to push or pull you to yet another level by making your current level content and hopefully unconformable.
This is why it is so very important and necessary to learn how to neutralize your ANTs, WORMS and FEARS because it causes you to move in quantum steps verses minute steps. You shorten your learning curve and lesson your barriers to entry at the next level in life when you confront the DNA programming that is keeping you where you are - within the Gravitational Pull of ANTs, WORMS & FEARS.
--------------------------------------------
Unlock the wealth already on your shelf! Claim your FREE 6-Day eCourse ($197 value) by sending an email to freecourse@shockwealth.com or visit www.shockwealth.com now!
An ANT is an acronym for Automatic Negative Thoughts.
What is a WORM?
A WORM is a metaphor for deep-seated, unconscious beliefs that lye dormant in our consciousness analogous to a computer virus that only activates when a certain button is pushed on our keyboard.
What is a FEAR?
A FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real; an optical illusion that makes you believe it is impossible to move beyond this point so why even try. FEAR is a lie!
ANTs are pre-conscious thoughts, beliefs, ideas that keep us trapped in our comfort zone. They exist to stop us from moving to far ahead of our current environment. They cause us to become uncomfortable with our potential and possibility.
They exist to keep us in a holding pattern where we don't act or do anything to better ourselves. They keep us stagnated and stifled. They cause us to sabotage our good.
WORMS are much stronger than ANTs and are more insidious and pervasive. If we are focused, we can overcome an ANT with sheer will power, but will power up against a WORM [deep seated, dominant belief] is like one soldier up against an entire army. A WORM will destroy will power and we will automatically sabotage our life and act in a manner consistent with our dominant beliefs.
For instance, we might have an ANT that says, "I'm not good enough to be with this person." If we force our way through that automatic negative thought using shear will power and continue to stay in the relationship, the ANT may be crushed but then the WORM will appear and may say, "You ARE NOT good enough to be with that person so why are you trying - LOSER!" At that moment when the unconscious, dominant belief has you in its grips, you will begin to slowly or abruptly (depending on frequency) sabotage the relationship in some shape, form or fashion.
The Law of Attraction
The law of attraction simply means that you attract in life what you are not what you want and what you are is what you think about when you are not thinking about anything. The law of attraction states who you are - your dominant beliefs and unconscious thoughts; i.e., DNA (see SHOCKphilosophy? Principle #4) -- ANTs, WORMS and FEARS.
I am sure you have heard the term, like attracts like. It's the reason why rich people hang out with rich people and poor people hang out with poor people. What we must be mindful of is our DNA programming is designed not to go outside of its comfort zone for extended periods of time. With that said, it's understandable why we feel uncomfortable when we are around something or someone we have never been exposed to that stretches us, challenges us to be more, do more and having more. So it is our DNA programming; ANTs, WOMRS, and FEARS that keep us locked into this vicious cycle that gives the illusion of progression when in fact we are on auto-repeat; just standing still. We then attract people, places and things in our life to confirm this process and keep us in a holding pattern.
The law of attraction is so powerful that if you had two pianos in different rooms and struck the c-note on the first piano the other piano's c-chord would be vibrating as well. The law of attraction is gravitational which is why in order to move to the next quantum or level in life we must first move and expand our consciousness so that we can attract a different outcome.
In order to move from one gravitational pull to another, we must become comfortable with being uncomfortable, face our ANTs, WORMS and FEARS and learn how to handle next level thinking. When you expand consciousness, expand spiritually, emotionally and psychologically, you automatically move into another vibration or gravitational pull. You will also bring along with you for the ride and new set of ANTs, WORMS and FEARS whose soul purpose is to push or pull you to yet another level by making your current level content and hopefully unconformable.
This is why it is so very important and necessary to learn how to neutralize your ANTs, WORMS and FEARS because it causes you to move in quantum steps verses minute steps. You shorten your learning curve and lesson your barriers to entry at the next level in life when you confront the DNA programming that is keeping you where you are - within the Gravitational Pull of ANTs, WORMS & FEARS.
--------------------------------------------
Unlock the wealth already on your shelf! Claim your FREE 6-Day eCourse ($197 value) by sending an email to freecourse@shockwealth.com or visit www.shockwealth.com now!
The Reasons Why We Fear Success
In the book, The SHOCKwealth System?, it is discussed that there are four fears that must be overcome in order to experience true success. One of those fears is the fear of success itself. The Fear Of Success is the self-sabotaging fear.
Have you ever come close to actualizing a goal that you have put forth--- only to walk away from it or sabotage it when it appeared that victory was finally near?
The fear of success is what I refer to as ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) and WORMS (Deep seated, unconscious beliefs and fears that act like computer viruses) in the Principles outlined in the SHOCKphilosophy?. You may fear spiritual enlightenment; successful relationships, success in finances, success in health and so on. Regardless of what kind of success you fear, it's an insidious fear virus that must be dealt with as pervasively as the fear itself.
Do you recognize these ANTs?:
? Mo money, mo problems
? I won't know how to manage all of that money
? My parents or grandparents had money and they are miserable because of it
? I don't have the education to be rich
? God, my religion says that I should be poor and live below my means
I'm sure you can add to the list. Here are a few more reasons why we fear success in life?
Accountability/Responsibility
When I was a Personal Trainer, I had a fellow trainer who used to tell me that he didn't want to become too successful or rich. In fact, he said, 'I just want to be comfortable.' Whatever the hell that means. He continued to explain to me why he didn't want wealth and success in life. 'I don't want to become too rich or successful because that is when people start coming after you.'
I thought about what he said and he is partially right. As Dr. John F. Demartini once said, "Life doesn't become easier, it only becomes more accountable." You've heard the phrase, "To whom much is given, much is required?" That is a fact and this is why the SHOCKphilosophy & the SHOCKprocess? is liberating so many lives. It gives you a tool or a weapon against the counter-thoughts/beliefs toward your desired level of success.
What if you had a process that could quickly identify the type of fear you have toward success and began the process of neutralizing that fear or finding how that fear serves your higher good and best interest?
With wealth, success, happiness and just being highly competent at anything, creates an accountability and responsibility to be the best that you can be at what you wish to be. Learning how to harness the power of the fear of success rather than run away from it requires a process, a SHOCKprocess. But, once you understand that fear is and always will be your best friend, you are no longer hindered by fear you are forever liberating from fear.
The Fear of the Unknown
We fear success because we have never been successful at that which we wish to become successful, so there is an inherent fear of the unknown or the 'What if.'
If I asked you to go into a darkened room where you could not see your hand before your face and you didn't know if there were ceilings or floors but you heard the sound of a growling tiger - what would you feel? What if I told you that in this room are billions of combinations that can make you instantly rich, improve your health, rekindle your current relationship or help you find the love of your life - what would you do? Would you go it this room and at least check it out?
Would you take the chance? Most people would not and this is the essence of the Fear Of Success. As I discuss in the SHOCKphilosophy? most people have ANTs, or Automatic Negative Thoughts that automatically hinder them and talk them out of their greatness and potential for success, wealth and happiness.
By identifying what your individual, unconscious fear looks like, you will be able to transcend repeat failure and trends in your life.
The Fear of Public Scrutiny/Resentment
Yes, it is true; poor-minded people hate rich-minded people. Notice I said, 'poor-minded.' Not all poor people hate the rich and wealthy, but if you haven't been watching the news lately, you may have noticed that it is an all out war on those who have publicly announced their wealth.
If you are a Celebrity, a successful Entrepreneur, a noted Author on wealth, or have become so rich in business that it has garnered media attention, you will more than likely be put on public display to defend your so-called, 'SHOCKwealth?.'
The message that the media sends out to the masses is, 'Don't get too big or rich for your britches, or we will come after you and expose your innermost turmoil to the public.' This dynamic creates and breeds a WORM; that causes us to fear success at the public level. There was even a Rap Song made famous by P Diddy and Biggie Smalls called, 'Mo Money, Mo Problems.'
Do you have the fear of success? Would you like to know how to identify and neutralize this deep seated fear/belief? Check out the SHOCKphilosophy?, and signup for the next SHOCKprocess? Focus Group to truly begin to identify and neutralize your WORMS and ANTs - the fear of success.
© 2004 The SHOCKpublishing Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
--------------------------------------------
Unlock the wealth already on your shelf! Claim your FREE 6-Day eCourse ($197 value) by sending an email to freecourse@shockwealth.com or visit www.shockwealth.com now!
Have you ever come close to actualizing a goal that you have put forth--- only to walk away from it or sabotage it when it appeared that victory was finally near?
The fear of success is what I refer to as ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) and WORMS (Deep seated, unconscious beliefs and fears that act like computer viruses) in the Principles outlined in the SHOCKphilosophy?. You may fear spiritual enlightenment; successful relationships, success in finances, success in health and so on. Regardless of what kind of success you fear, it's an insidious fear virus that must be dealt with as pervasively as the fear itself.
Do you recognize these ANTs?:
? Mo money, mo problems
? I won't know how to manage all of that money
? My parents or grandparents had money and they are miserable because of it
? I don't have the education to be rich
? God, my religion says that I should be poor and live below my means
I'm sure you can add to the list. Here are a few more reasons why we fear success in life?
Accountability/Responsibility
When I was a Personal Trainer, I had a fellow trainer who used to tell me that he didn't want to become too successful or rich. In fact, he said, 'I just want to be comfortable.' Whatever the hell that means. He continued to explain to me why he didn't want wealth and success in life. 'I don't want to become too rich or successful because that is when people start coming after you.'
I thought about what he said and he is partially right. As Dr. John F. Demartini once said, "Life doesn't become easier, it only becomes more accountable." You've heard the phrase, "To whom much is given, much is required?" That is a fact and this is why the SHOCKphilosophy & the SHOCKprocess? is liberating so many lives. It gives you a tool or a weapon against the counter-thoughts/beliefs toward your desired level of success.
What if you had a process that could quickly identify the type of fear you have toward success and began the process of neutralizing that fear or finding how that fear serves your higher good and best interest?
With wealth, success, happiness and just being highly competent at anything, creates an accountability and responsibility to be the best that you can be at what you wish to be. Learning how to harness the power of the fear of success rather than run away from it requires a process, a SHOCKprocess. But, once you understand that fear is and always will be your best friend, you are no longer hindered by fear you are forever liberating from fear.
The Fear of the Unknown
We fear success because we have never been successful at that which we wish to become successful, so there is an inherent fear of the unknown or the 'What if.'
If I asked you to go into a darkened room where you could not see your hand before your face and you didn't know if there were ceilings or floors but you heard the sound of a growling tiger - what would you feel? What if I told you that in this room are billions of combinations that can make you instantly rich, improve your health, rekindle your current relationship or help you find the love of your life - what would you do? Would you go it this room and at least check it out?
Would you take the chance? Most people would not and this is the essence of the Fear Of Success. As I discuss in the SHOCKphilosophy? most people have ANTs, or Automatic Negative Thoughts that automatically hinder them and talk them out of their greatness and potential for success, wealth and happiness.
By identifying what your individual, unconscious fear looks like, you will be able to transcend repeat failure and trends in your life.
The Fear of Public Scrutiny/Resentment
Yes, it is true; poor-minded people hate rich-minded people. Notice I said, 'poor-minded.' Not all poor people hate the rich and wealthy, but if you haven't been watching the news lately, you may have noticed that it is an all out war on those who have publicly announced their wealth.
If you are a Celebrity, a successful Entrepreneur, a noted Author on wealth, or have become so rich in business that it has garnered media attention, you will more than likely be put on public display to defend your so-called, 'SHOCKwealth?.'
The message that the media sends out to the masses is, 'Don't get too big or rich for your britches, or we will come after you and expose your innermost turmoil to the public.' This dynamic creates and breeds a WORM; that causes us to fear success at the public level. There was even a Rap Song made famous by P Diddy and Biggie Smalls called, 'Mo Money, Mo Problems.'
Do you have the fear of success? Would you like to know how to identify and neutralize this deep seated fear/belief? Check out the SHOCKphilosophy?, and signup for the next SHOCKprocess? Focus Group to truly begin to identify and neutralize your WORMS and ANTs - the fear of success.
© 2004 The SHOCKpublishing Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
--------------------------------------------
Unlock the wealth already on your shelf! Claim your FREE 6-Day eCourse ($197 value) by sending an email to freecourse@shockwealth.com or visit www.shockwealth.com now!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
The One-Two Punch for Success: Authenticity and Alignment
Have you ever felt as if you are beating your head against a wall? You repeatedly try to reach a goal but you never seem to achieve it. Instead you are struggling rather than moving forward and achieving your goals with grace and ease.
You are not alone. The struggle to move from what we don't want to what we do want is, unfortunately, a fundamental struggle for many individuals. Believe it or not, it is very common for people to struggle against what they want and to actively limit their good.
In order to have what you want, you must be willing to end the struggle and move into action. Your success is dependent on your ability to reach your goals and achieve.
The easiest way to move from "stuck" into action without struggle is to be authentic and to be in alignment with your authenticity. Authenticity means that you are connected to your core and that your desires are a true reflection of your inner self and soul.
Alignment means that your entire being is in agreement with the goal you want to achieve. For example, you come home from work one evening and you are very tired. But this evening is your work-out night. You sit on the couch and actually have to talk yourself into getting into your gym clothes and heading off to the gym. What you did in convincing part of yourself to go to the gym when it really wanted to rest on the couch is called alignment. You got yourself into alignment with the idea and intention of going to the gym no matter how tired a part of you felt.
To end struggle and successfully achieve goals, all parts of you must work together for manifestation. That means all bodies, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual, must be in agreement concerning a goal. There can be no doubts, limiting beliefs or attachments. The following describes a process you can use to do an authenticity check concerning your goals and bring yourself into alignment with your goals.
Step One: Sit quietly - create a peaceful, serene and nurturing space for yourself. It must be a space where you feel comfortable and secure. Spend several minutes in quiet and inner reflection upon your goal. Have paper and pen handy.
Step Two: The Authenticity Check: Ask within if this goal is the appropriate goal for you to achieve at this time. If the answer is yes, skip to the next step. If the answer is no, ask what a more appropriate goal would be for you right now.
By asking this question, you move from being ruled by the needs of the mind (survival issues) and begin to access the soul within. You leave behind the petty desires of the ego and move into realizing the desires of the soul. As a result, your goals become truer and more authentic.
Write down the response you receive. If you need additional clarity concerning the response, ask for it. Keep asking within until you feel complete.
Step Three: Alignment. Once you have a defined and authentic goal, it is time to create alignment. Remain in your space of quiet and comfort; ask to speak to your mental body. (You will repeat step Three with each of the bodies) Ask your mental body if it is willing to be in alignment with you goal. The purpose of this question is to uncover any blocks or limitations that reside in the mental body concerning the goal. If the answer is yes, proceed to the next body: physical, spiritual and emotional.
If the answer is no, simply begin a conversation with this part of you. Some questions to begin with are: Why are you not willing to be in alignment with this goal? What would it take for you to be in alignment with this goal?
When a part is not willing to be in alignment with an authentic goal, the cause may be fear or insecurity. Usually the situation is remedied by helping the part understand that it is taken care of, that it is safe and that it has nothing to fear. Simply, have a conversation with the part and inform it of the truth.
Once you receive the willingness of all the bodies, remember to thank them for supporting the manifestation of this authentic goal. Affirm your alignment with this goal and your intention to manifest it.
By completing this process, you have created an authentic goal and brought yourself into full alignment with this goal. You can now move forward without struggle because all blocks have been removed. Success shall be yours.
Rebecca Le Vine is a Life Coach helping clients to achieve quick results through her customized coaching plans. For further information, go to www.mysticcenter.com.
You are not alone. The struggle to move from what we don't want to what we do want is, unfortunately, a fundamental struggle for many individuals. Believe it or not, it is very common for people to struggle against what they want and to actively limit their good.
In order to have what you want, you must be willing to end the struggle and move into action. Your success is dependent on your ability to reach your goals and achieve.
The easiest way to move from "stuck" into action without struggle is to be authentic and to be in alignment with your authenticity. Authenticity means that you are connected to your core and that your desires are a true reflection of your inner self and soul.
Alignment means that your entire being is in agreement with the goal you want to achieve. For example, you come home from work one evening and you are very tired. But this evening is your work-out night. You sit on the couch and actually have to talk yourself into getting into your gym clothes and heading off to the gym. What you did in convincing part of yourself to go to the gym when it really wanted to rest on the couch is called alignment. You got yourself into alignment with the idea and intention of going to the gym no matter how tired a part of you felt.
To end struggle and successfully achieve goals, all parts of you must work together for manifestation. That means all bodies, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual, must be in agreement concerning a goal. There can be no doubts, limiting beliefs or attachments. The following describes a process you can use to do an authenticity check concerning your goals and bring yourself into alignment with your goals.
Step One: Sit quietly - create a peaceful, serene and nurturing space for yourself. It must be a space where you feel comfortable and secure. Spend several minutes in quiet and inner reflection upon your goal. Have paper and pen handy.
Step Two: The Authenticity Check: Ask within if this goal is the appropriate goal for you to achieve at this time. If the answer is yes, skip to the next step. If the answer is no, ask what a more appropriate goal would be for you right now.
By asking this question, you move from being ruled by the needs of the mind (survival issues) and begin to access the soul within. You leave behind the petty desires of the ego and move into realizing the desires of the soul. As a result, your goals become truer and more authentic.
Write down the response you receive. If you need additional clarity concerning the response, ask for it. Keep asking within until you feel complete.
Step Three: Alignment. Once you have a defined and authentic goal, it is time to create alignment. Remain in your space of quiet and comfort; ask to speak to your mental body. (You will repeat step Three with each of the bodies) Ask your mental body if it is willing to be in alignment with you goal. The purpose of this question is to uncover any blocks or limitations that reside in the mental body concerning the goal. If the answer is yes, proceed to the next body: physical, spiritual and emotional.
If the answer is no, simply begin a conversation with this part of you. Some questions to begin with are: Why are you not willing to be in alignment with this goal? What would it take for you to be in alignment with this goal?
When a part is not willing to be in alignment with an authentic goal, the cause may be fear or insecurity. Usually the situation is remedied by helping the part understand that it is taken care of, that it is safe and that it has nothing to fear. Simply, have a conversation with the part and inform it of the truth.
Once you receive the willingness of all the bodies, remember to thank them for supporting the manifestation of this authentic goal. Affirm your alignment with this goal and your intention to manifest it.
By completing this process, you have created an authentic goal and brought yourself into full alignment with this goal. You can now move forward without struggle because all blocks have been removed. Success shall be yours.
Rebecca Le Vine is a Life Coach helping clients to achieve quick results through her customized coaching plans. For further information, go to www.mysticcenter.com.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Life Versus Lifestyle
There is a difference but what constitutes a life and what constitutes a lifestyle is pretty ambiguous. One thing that seems pretty clear to me is the lifestyle is observable while a life can have many internal aspects to it. A lifestyle can include people, material things, environments, how we spend our time, energy, and money. A life includes things like our beliefs, our values, our commitments, our soul's dream, and our vision. If you choose a lifestyle first you could wind up with an empty fortress. If you choose the life first, you will design your lifestyle to support the life.
Since most of us already have a lifestyle, and a default life, we usually have to do some redesign work. Choose a life and then redesign our lifestyle. It is possible that the lifestyle you currently have will never support the life you truly want to live. It is possible the lifestyle you currently have has many supporting structures and only minor renovations need to occur. It is possible that you are a highly intuitive person and your lifestyle is in perfect alignment. I know very few people who fall into that category. My dad does but what I notice about him, is he and my mother made a conscious decision to structure their lives around their spiritual values. They made that decision early in their marriage and lived true to it. Now it's interesting that my parents are actually old enough to be my grandparents, (my mother is no long living) and I noticed that many earlier generations were not given to having transformational conversations so learning was a very different process then than it is now. The fact that we have e-courses and teleclasses and magazines and tons of books that are created to help people learn to live more meaningful and personally fulfilling lives represents a shift from how things use to be.
As we evolve we begin to look at various aspects of our lives for congruence to our values and commitments. The disparity shows up with exclamation marks behind them and sometimes our response is discouragement and self-disappointment. We act as if we should have known better when the truth is how could we have known better? So the first thing to get over is "I didn't know" and then after we get over that we come to "but I know now?now what?" It takes a courageous person to see this and then set their intentions on bringing integrity into their life so that their lifestyle gives them a life that serves their higher self. You will notice some people trying to work around it, pretending it doesn't matter that their lifestyles don't measure up to their core values.
The real problem is once you see the inconsistency, not doing anything actually makes things worse and you lose ground really fast. It cost you big time to keep that inconsistency in place. You can't be with yourself and be at peace in your life. It wears you down like water will wear down a mountain over time. Your life will devolve instead of evolve. If that is not a price that's too high to pay, I don't know what is. Just think about it and choose wisely the path you will follow.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach whose focus is to empower self-motivated entrepreneurs and individuals to achieve their greatest potential while discovering and honoring their core values. Contact Robin through her web site http://www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com
Since most of us already have a lifestyle, and a default life, we usually have to do some redesign work. Choose a life and then redesign our lifestyle. It is possible that the lifestyle you currently have will never support the life you truly want to live. It is possible the lifestyle you currently have has many supporting structures and only minor renovations need to occur. It is possible that you are a highly intuitive person and your lifestyle is in perfect alignment. I know very few people who fall into that category. My dad does but what I notice about him, is he and my mother made a conscious decision to structure their lives around their spiritual values. They made that decision early in their marriage and lived true to it. Now it's interesting that my parents are actually old enough to be my grandparents, (my mother is no long living) and I noticed that many earlier generations were not given to having transformational conversations so learning was a very different process then than it is now. The fact that we have e-courses and teleclasses and magazines and tons of books that are created to help people learn to live more meaningful and personally fulfilling lives represents a shift from how things use to be.
As we evolve we begin to look at various aspects of our lives for congruence to our values and commitments. The disparity shows up with exclamation marks behind them and sometimes our response is discouragement and self-disappointment. We act as if we should have known better when the truth is how could we have known better? So the first thing to get over is "I didn't know" and then after we get over that we come to "but I know now?now what?" It takes a courageous person to see this and then set their intentions on bringing integrity into their life so that their lifestyle gives them a life that serves their higher self. You will notice some people trying to work around it, pretending it doesn't matter that their lifestyles don't measure up to their core values.
The real problem is once you see the inconsistency, not doing anything actually makes things worse and you lose ground really fast. It cost you big time to keep that inconsistency in place. You can't be with yourself and be at peace in your life. It wears you down like water will wear down a mountain over time. Your life will devolve instead of evolve. If that is not a price that's too high to pay, I don't know what is. Just think about it and choose wisely the path you will follow.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach whose focus is to empower self-motivated entrepreneurs and individuals to achieve their greatest potential while discovering and honoring their core values. Contact Robin through her web site http://www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com
Make The Second Half The Best Half
Something happens when you come to the intersection called mid-life; you can look back in retrospect and see your life from an entirely different context. For many this mid-life review brings about a sense of urgency that ignites what is formally called "the mid-life crisis". It's where we can trace the effects back to causes that were initiated by our own poor decision, our inattention to important details, our recklessness, our fear, our misplaced priorities, and our ignorance. It can be a pretty bleak experience to really understand, maybe for the first time, that your life really could have been much better if you only knew then what you know now.
Ah but there is a subtle sweetness in enduring the emotional upheaval of a mid-life review and that is the fact that you can decide that the second half will be the best half. You can garner the lessons from your past life by taking the knowledge and the wisdom, and leaving the rest behind. You may also experience grief, regret, anger, and blame. Whatever gut-wrenching emotions you feel should be acknowledged and then gently released. You can choose rather you will continue down your current path or if you will choose a new direction for your life. By consciously deciding how you will live the rest of your life, you can create a life that is extraordinary.
It's a mighty sweet deal when you think about it but how do you make it happen?
Here is a 5-point plan that you can customize and implement in 2 to 5 years that will make the next 40 mean more than you could possibly imagine.
Step 1. Create a life vision, not fantasy, that is worth living into that includes personal, professional, and spiritual growth, leveraging your abilities, gifts, and life experiences, contributing to others, having accomplishments that take you beyond lifestyle and status, and building relationships that are life-enhancing.
Step 2. Form alliances with those who walk in front of you, beside you, and behind you. There are those who will be teachers and role models in your life, those who will be companions and friends, and those who will be students. Honor each type of relationship for they will all help you advance in life.
Step 3. Remove barriers to success by installing new personal qualities, beliefs, habits, skills, and relationships as required. Learn to observe your sticking points, your hot buttons, your negative patterns and work to dismantle them one by one with the understanding that this is a lifetime commitment that requires diligence, patience, and self-care.
Step 4. Learn to fan the fires of your own burning desire. Replenish and renew yourself in healthy ways and learn to balance the various aspects of your life so that you are left feeling whole.
Step 5. Stay in the game and expect to win. Know that the Universe is on your side and life embraces and supports evolution and you are playing a critical role in your own personal evolution.
Why should you expect to spend at least 2 years in this redesign process?
Society has programmed us to expect glorified results instantly but upon closer examination, it becomes obvious that the value of a microwave life is commensurate with the investment of time, energy, and resources. The value of life is not just measured by outcomes but also by the process that produces those outcomes. In other words, the joy of living?is living. In 2 to 5 years you will discover aspects of yourself that reveal your true brilliance. You will shed many false perceptions that have restricted and confined you. The rigorous work you will do will be accompanied by a manifold of rewards; expected and unexpected.
Of course, it could happen in less time because the time it actually takes is totally dependant on how much you resist change and how willing you are leave the your herded existence behind. You see, a great life is available to the masses but the masses will not forsake their average existence to claim their inheritance. To create an extraordinary life requires that we learn from our mistakes and our victories and continuously reexamine our personal paradigms adjusting them as needed. When you are making the second half the best half, you will find that you will be in a constant state of personal evolution. As you move toward your life's purpose your envisioned life will become the master plan that will guide your life's choices if it has been carefully designed to holistically reflect your individual uniqueness, which is woven into the expression of your values, contributions, and priorities.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach whose focus is to empower self-motivated entrepreneurs and individuals to achieve their greatest potential while discovering and honoring their core values. Contact Robin through her web site http://www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com
Ah but there is a subtle sweetness in enduring the emotional upheaval of a mid-life review and that is the fact that you can decide that the second half will be the best half. You can garner the lessons from your past life by taking the knowledge and the wisdom, and leaving the rest behind. You may also experience grief, regret, anger, and blame. Whatever gut-wrenching emotions you feel should be acknowledged and then gently released. You can choose rather you will continue down your current path or if you will choose a new direction for your life. By consciously deciding how you will live the rest of your life, you can create a life that is extraordinary.
It's a mighty sweet deal when you think about it but how do you make it happen?
Here is a 5-point plan that you can customize and implement in 2 to 5 years that will make the next 40 mean more than you could possibly imagine.
Step 1. Create a life vision, not fantasy, that is worth living into that includes personal, professional, and spiritual growth, leveraging your abilities, gifts, and life experiences, contributing to others, having accomplishments that take you beyond lifestyle and status, and building relationships that are life-enhancing.
Step 2. Form alliances with those who walk in front of you, beside you, and behind you. There are those who will be teachers and role models in your life, those who will be companions and friends, and those who will be students. Honor each type of relationship for they will all help you advance in life.
Step 3. Remove barriers to success by installing new personal qualities, beliefs, habits, skills, and relationships as required. Learn to observe your sticking points, your hot buttons, your negative patterns and work to dismantle them one by one with the understanding that this is a lifetime commitment that requires diligence, patience, and self-care.
Step 4. Learn to fan the fires of your own burning desire. Replenish and renew yourself in healthy ways and learn to balance the various aspects of your life so that you are left feeling whole.
Step 5. Stay in the game and expect to win. Know that the Universe is on your side and life embraces and supports evolution and you are playing a critical role in your own personal evolution.
Why should you expect to spend at least 2 years in this redesign process?
Society has programmed us to expect glorified results instantly but upon closer examination, it becomes obvious that the value of a microwave life is commensurate with the investment of time, energy, and resources. The value of life is not just measured by outcomes but also by the process that produces those outcomes. In other words, the joy of living?is living. In 2 to 5 years you will discover aspects of yourself that reveal your true brilliance. You will shed many false perceptions that have restricted and confined you. The rigorous work you will do will be accompanied by a manifold of rewards; expected and unexpected.
Of course, it could happen in less time because the time it actually takes is totally dependant on how much you resist change and how willing you are leave the your herded existence behind. You see, a great life is available to the masses but the masses will not forsake their average existence to claim their inheritance. To create an extraordinary life requires that we learn from our mistakes and our victories and continuously reexamine our personal paradigms adjusting them as needed. When you are making the second half the best half, you will find that you will be in a constant state of personal evolution. As you move toward your life's purpose your envisioned life will become the master plan that will guide your life's choices if it has been carefully designed to holistically reflect your individual uniqueness, which is woven into the expression of your values, contributions, and priorities.
Robin Harris is a DesignerLife Coach whose focus is to empower self-motivated entrepreneurs and individuals to achieve their greatest potential while discovering and honoring their core values. Contact Robin through her web site http://www.designerlifecoaching.com or by email at robin@designerlifecoaching.com
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
What Am I Going To Do With The Rest Of My Life?
Unexpected life changes. Anticipated transitions. Long, sleepless nights. What do these three things have in common? The ability to provoke one of the most haunting questions in the library of human introspectives:
"What on earth am I going to do with the rest of my life?"
While I can't pretend to answer to this question for anyone other than myself, I can offer those in this position some basic tips on how to ensure that their future turns out as bright as their class valedictorian said it would be.
Take Time To Create A Map
Too often, when faced with a major (or even not so major) life decision, we tend to either take the first decent choice that presents itself or we allow circumstances to choose for us by default - putting off the decision until the inexorable current of life sweeps us past the turning point. As you can imagine, this is not the best way to get what you want out of life. But the options we are faced with in life can be so wildly divergent, or so deceptively similar, that it is difficult to know which turning to take. Wouldn't it be great if we had some kind of road map that would help us know which paths to follow and which to pass by?
Below are five questions that everybody should ask himself or herself before starting out on any new path. The answers to these questions should then be used to guide decisions and to direct actions - when a choice comes up, simply compare the various options with your stated desires and choose the option that takes you closer to (or at least moves you the least farthest away from) your destination - your stated goals and desires.
1. What does success mean to me?
Be very specific. "I want to be rich," is not an answer - just what does "rich" mean, anyway? Are you thinking of a set number? And if so, why? Or is the term "rich" a substitute for certain freedoms and opportunities that you view as coming only with money - and by limiting them to being accessed only through money, are you missing out on other alternative pathways?
Some more specific alternatives to "I want to be rich," depending on the individual, might be: "I want to have enough net income to meet my current financial responsibilities without strain, plus have time and money left over for travel," or "I want to be able to comfortably afford a jet-setting lifestyle in New York City," or "I want to spend 4 days a week at home with my kids," etc. You should try to come up with at least three answers to the question of what success really means to you personally, with each one reflecting a different facet of what you feel makes up a truly successful life. And keep the money issue to just one statement - after all, such things as personal fulfillment, spiritual meaning and other essential needs and values cannot be solved, acquired or even influenced by money
One of the biggest obstacles to success is that most of us have never consciously explored what that means to us, aside from some vague and nebulous idea of fame, fortune or other worldly success. Knowing what success really means to you - what you hope or imagine that these generic definitions of success would actually provide and how you want those things to physically look like in your life - allows you to weigh your choices more accurately.
2. What are my non-negotiable needs?
List all the things that you envision as inescapable parameters of a successful and enjoyable life. Family, travel, no debt, pleasant work environment, social status, contributions to society, spiritual involvement, public acclaim, love, excitement, comfort - any or all of these, and any others you can think of are legitimate needs that when not met create an environment of stress, want and disempowerment in your life. Knowing what you are not willing to do without makes the relative values of different options clearer.
3. What are my non-negotiable boundaries?
List all the things that you absolutely do not want present in your life. If the idea of working in a standard hierarchical office environment makes you ill, put that down. If you can't stand the thought of living in a cold climate, add that to the list. If being poked fun at about your physical condition or other attributes makes life unlivable, note that as well. By knowing what you will not tolerate, many choices become much easier to make. Plus, it allows you to set down rules and policies about who and what you will invite into your life and the standards of behavior you will, and will not, tolerate.
4. What are my key values?
Spend some time searching your soul to come up with a list of your basic values, creating a life around which would make you the person you want to be and allow you to live the life you want to live. Are you the type who values honesty, clean/green living and a deep love of nature above all things? Or are you more of a 'comforts of home', family and fun kind of person? Do you value charity over letting others find their way on their own, or is it the other way around? Knowing what you truly stand for is a vital component of good decision-making.
5. What do I want to be remembered for?
What legacy do you want to leave here when you pass on? What do you want people to say about your life and you as a person? What do you want to be known for? What would you like your obituary to say about you? Knowing where you want to end up makes choosing the path to get there, and keeping track of your progress, infinitely easier.
Key Points To Consider
There are three key points to keep in mind when you are faced with making life-changing decisions.
1. Look before you leap.
In life, as in commercial marketing, "Buy now before this opportunity is gone!" is almost always code-speak for, "Buy now, before you have time to read the fine print." True, from time to time real, honest-to-goodness, amazing, once-in-a-lifetime offers do come around. But if you have laid down a foundation of well-considered choices and clear-minded focus before this happens, you will have the presence of mind and strength of purpose to know when to jump and when to pass, and be much more capable of telling the difference between a missed opportunity and a close call.
2. Life is no longer a "one chance per person" event.
The times, they are definitely a'changing, and one of the best things to come out of that change is that we now understand that people change as well and that not only is this normal, it is to be expected. The career or life that suited you perfectly in your 20's will most likely not fit the middle-aged you, no more than the same wardrobe or lifestyle would. Sometimes this is merely the result of the normal process of personal evolution we all go through as we age and mature, and sometimes it comes about suddenly in response to reality-shifting events and life-changing transitions such as living through a traumatic event, losing a job or getting married.
However change comes, be prepared to go with the flow. Don't worry about "all that time I spent in grad school," or what your friends and family will say. In the first instance, there is no such thing as "sunk costs" in life - 90% of nearly any education or life experience is 100% transferable to new situations and new outlets. In sports they call it "cross-training," and an athlete doesn't consider his or her training complete without in. In the second instance, well, if they love you they will want you to be happy and if they don't love you, then who cares what they think? Besides, they're not the ones who have to live this life - you are.
Also falling under this heading is the admonition not to trade a good life now for some nebulous "better tomorrow," such as spending your life zombie-ing through a career you hate for the promise of a pensioned retirement. All too often, these "tomorrows," if they ever do come, are no better than the "nows" you wasted. And as often as not the stress of living an unhappy life permanently cripples or even kills people, physically or otherwise, well before they can get to their imagined golden "tomorrow."
3. Trying to find your "one, true purpose" is a waste of life.
We are all put here on this earth for any number of reasons - some big, some small and most of which we will never understand or even realize we've participated in until well after they've become distant memory. Spending too much time trying to scry your "true purpose" in the tea leaves of life can take your attention and energy away from creating the kind of life that would actually support the accomplishment these purposes in the first place.
A far better is alternative to create what I call a "Groundhog Day-Proof Life." Based on the Bill Murray movie in which his character has to live the same day over and over, this concept involves creating a life that reflects your values, offers you opportunities to challenge yourself and is fulfilling enough and just plain pleasant enough so that if by some strange cosmic fluke you became trapped in any given day of your life, it would be a good thing rather than a tragedy. Living this sort of life virtually ensures that you will be who and wherer you need to be to fulfill any purpose you may have been sent here to accomplish, while at the same time providing you with a wonderful and rewarding "rest of your life" in the process.
Summary
Getting the most out of life isn't about living "right". It's about living well. Learning to consciously steer your life in the direction you want to take it, making the choice to live by your own set of values and desires and making sure that you get the most out of the limited days you are given to work with ensures that when the time comes for your life to pass before your eyes in review, the show will definitely be worth the price of the admission.
(c) Soni Pitts
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Soni Pitts is the Chief Visionary Butt-Kicker of SoniPitts.Com. She specializes in helping others reclaim "soul proprietorship" in their lives and to begin living the life their Creator always intended for them.
She is the author of the free e-book "50 Ways To Reach Your Goals" and over 100 self-help and inspirational articles, as well as other products and resources designed to facilitate this process of personal growth and spiritual development.
"What on earth am I going to do with the rest of my life?"
While I can't pretend to answer to this question for anyone other than myself, I can offer those in this position some basic tips on how to ensure that their future turns out as bright as their class valedictorian said it would be.
Take Time To Create A Map
Too often, when faced with a major (or even not so major) life decision, we tend to either take the first decent choice that presents itself or we allow circumstances to choose for us by default - putting off the decision until the inexorable current of life sweeps us past the turning point. As you can imagine, this is not the best way to get what you want out of life. But the options we are faced with in life can be so wildly divergent, or so deceptively similar, that it is difficult to know which turning to take. Wouldn't it be great if we had some kind of road map that would help us know which paths to follow and which to pass by?
Below are five questions that everybody should ask himself or herself before starting out on any new path. The answers to these questions should then be used to guide decisions and to direct actions - when a choice comes up, simply compare the various options with your stated desires and choose the option that takes you closer to (or at least moves you the least farthest away from) your destination - your stated goals and desires.
1. What does success mean to me?
Be very specific. "I want to be rich," is not an answer - just what does "rich" mean, anyway? Are you thinking of a set number? And if so, why? Or is the term "rich" a substitute for certain freedoms and opportunities that you view as coming only with money - and by limiting them to being accessed only through money, are you missing out on other alternative pathways?
Some more specific alternatives to "I want to be rich," depending on the individual, might be: "I want to have enough net income to meet my current financial responsibilities without strain, plus have time and money left over for travel," or "I want to be able to comfortably afford a jet-setting lifestyle in New York City," or "I want to spend 4 days a week at home with my kids," etc. You should try to come up with at least three answers to the question of what success really means to you personally, with each one reflecting a different facet of what you feel makes up a truly successful life. And keep the money issue to just one statement - after all, such things as personal fulfillment, spiritual meaning and other essential needs and values cannot be solved, acquired or even influenced by money
One of the biggest obstacles to success is that most of us have never consciously explored what that means to us, aside from some vague and nebulous idea of fame, fortune or other worldly success. Knowing what success really means to you - what you hope or imagine that these generic definitions of success would actually provide and how you want those things to physically look like in your life - allows you to weigh your choices more accurately.
2. What are my non-negotiable needs?
List all the things that you envision as inescapable parameters of a successful and enjoyable life. Family, travel, no debt, pleasant work environment, social status, contributions to society, spiritual involvement, public acclaim, love, excitement, comfort - any or all of these, and any others you can think of are legitimate needs that when not met create an environment of stress, want and disempowerment in your life. Knowing what you are not willing to do without makes the relative values of different options clearer.
3. What are my non-negotiable boundaries?
List all the things that you absolutely do not want present in your life. If the idea of working in a standard hierarchical office environment makes you ill, put that down. If you can't stand the thought of living in a cold climate, add that to the list. If being poked fun at about your physical condition or other attributes makes life unlivable, note that as well. By knowing what you will not tolerate, many choices become much easier to make. Plus, it allows you to set down rules and policies about who and what you will invite into your life and the standards of behavior you will, and will not, tolerate.
4. What are my key values?
Spend some time searching your soul to come up with a list of your basic values, creating a life around which would make you the person you want to be and allow you to live the life you want to live. Are you the type who values honesty, clean/green living and a deep love of nature above all things? Or are you more of a 'comforts of home', family and fun kind of person? Do you value charity over letting others find their way on their own, or is it the other way around? Knowing what you truly stand for is a vital component of good decision-making.
5. What do I want to be remembered for?
What legacy do you want to leave here when you pass on? What do you want people to say about your life and you as a person? What do you want to be known for? What would you like your obituary to say about you? Knowing where you want to end up makes choosing the path to get there, and keeping track of your progress, infinitely easier.
Key Points To Consider
There are three key points to keep in mind when you are faced with making life-changing decisions.
1. Look before you leap.
In life, as in commercial marketing, "Buy now before this opportunity is gone!" is almost always code-speak for, "Buy now, before you have time to read the fine print." True, from time to time real, honest-to-goodness, amazing, once-in-a-lifetime offers do come around. But if you have laid down a foundation of well-considered choices and clear-minded focus before this happens, you will have the presence of mind and strength of purpose to know when to jump and when to pass, and be much more capable of telling the difference between a missed opportunity and a close call.
2. Life is no longer a "one chance per person" event.
The times, they are definitely a'changing, and one of the best things to come out of that change is that we now understand that people change as well and that not only is this normal, it is to be expected. The career or life that suited you perfectly in your 20's will most likely not fit the middle-aged you, no more than the same wardrobe or lifestyle would. Sometimes this is merely the result of the normal process of personal evolution we all go through as we age and mature, and sometimes it comes about suddenly in response to reality-shifting events and life-changing transitions such as living through a traumatic event, losing a job or getting married.
However change comes, be prepared to go with the flow. Don't worry about "all that time I spent in grad school," or what your friends and family will say. In the first instance, there is no such thing as "sunk costs" in life - 90% of nearly any education or life experience is 100% transferable to new situations and new outlets. In sports they call it "cross-training," and an athlete doesn't consider his or her training complete without in. In the second instance, well, if they love you they will want you to be happy and if they don't love you, then who cares what they think? Besides, they're not the ones who have to live this life - you are.
Also falling under this heading is the admonition not to trade a good life now for some nebulous "better tomorrow," such as spending your life zombie-ing through a career you hate for the promise of a pensioned retirement. All too often, these "tomorrows," if they ever do come, are no better than the "nows" you wasted. And as often as not the stress of living an unhappy life permanently cripples or even kills people, physically or otherwise, well before they can get to their imagined golden "tomorrow."
3. Trying to find your "one, true purpose" is a waste of life.
We are all put here on this earth for any number of reasons - some big, some small and most of which we will never understand or even realize we've participated in until well after they've become distant memory. Spending too much time trying to scry your "true purpose" in the tea leaves of life can take your attention and energy away from creating the kind of life that would actually support the accomplishment these purposes in the first place.
A far better is alternative to create what I call a "Groundhog Day-Proof Life." Based on the Bill Murray movie in which his character has to live the same day over and over, this concept involves creating a life that reflects your values, offers you opportunities to challenge yourself and is fulfilling enough and just plain pleasant enough so that if by some strange cosmic fluke you became trapped in any given day of your life, it would be a good thing rather than a tragedy. Living this sort of life virtually ensures that you will be who and wherer you need to be to fulfill any purpose you may have been sent here to accomplish, while at the same time providing you with a wonderful and rewarding "rest of your life" in the process.
Summary
Getting the most out of life isn't about living "right". It's about living well. Learning to consciously steer your life in the direction you want to take it, making the choice to live by your own set of values and desires and making sure that you get the most out of the limited days you are given to work with ensures that when the time comes for your life to pass before your eyes in review, the show will definitely be worth the price of the admission.
(c) Soni Pitts
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Soni Pitts is the Chief Visionary Butt-Kicker of SoniPitts.Com. She specializes in helping others reclaim "soul proprietorship" in their lives and to begin living the life their Creator always intended for them.
She is the author of the free e-book "50 Ways To Reach Your Goals" and over 100 self-help and inspirational articles, as well as other products and resources designed to facilitate this process of personal growth and spiritual development.
Five Tips for Perfect Transition Decisions
You're considering a new career, new place to live or new business, retirement, or any other move. You ask, "Will I be happy?" If you remember the old, old song, "What will be" may not be the answer you're looking for.
There are no one-size-fits-all guidelines, but there are five questions that can help you anticipate how you'll enjoy what you get.
1. "Did I choose to make this move or am I being pressured?" When you feel in control, you are most likely to be happy after you make a move. When you feel you have few or no options, begin to explore strategies to regain your power.
2. "Am I moving to or moving from?" We've all been tempted to take a big leap and just leave whatever we'd like to escape. Sometimes the results bring surprising rewards. When you analyze what you want, rather than what you want to leave, you can make more effective decisions about your next career, city and business.
3. "Can I still be me?" I live in a town where many people move specifically for retirement. Many choose the most rural areas of the county, assuming they'll find nirvana when they've left city life behind. And many are miserable because they didn't realize what they needed to be happy - more stimulation and satisfaction than you can find in the country.
4. "Does my happiness depend on another person or organization?" You move to be closer to your grandchildren - and they're all grown up. You move for a company - and your job disappears due to a policy change. You can't prevent all surprises, but you can make contingency plans and create safety nets.
5. "What options will I have three years after I make the move? Five years?" Will you have more opportunities than you do now or will you feel trapped?
There's no way to predict what will happen, whether you turn left or right at the fork in the road. But the odds are something will change in three to five years. You'll be different. Your professional field will be different. Your workplace will be different. And you'll be ready to make another move.
Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., wrote Making the Big Move (New Harbinger 1999). She works with professionals who are tossing and turning over a career decision and need a coach to help them brainstorm a solution.
Website: http://www.cathygoodwin.com Your Next Move Ezine: http://www.cathygoodwin.com/subscribe.html or mailto:cathy@cathygoodwin.com with "YNM" in subject line. Contact: mailto:cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294
There are no one-size-fits-all guidelines, but there are five questions that can help you anticipate how you'll enjoy what you get.
1. "Did I choose to make this move or am I being pressured?" When you feel in control, you are most likely to be happy after you make a move. When you feel you have few or no options, begin to explore strategies to regain your power.
2. "Am I moving to or moving from?" We've all been tempted to take a big leap and just leave whatever we'd like to escape. Sometimes the results bring surprising rewards. When you analyze what you want, rather than what you want to leave, you can make more effective decisions about your next career, city and business.
3. "Can I still be me?" I live in a town where many people move specifically for retirement. Many choose the most rural areas of the county, assuming they'll find nirvana when they've left city life behind. And many are miserable because they didn't realize what they needed to be happy - more stimulation and satisfaction than you can find in the country.
4. "Does my happiness depend on another person or organization?" You move to be closer to your grandchildren - and they're all grown up. You move for a company - and your job disappears due to a policy change. You can't prevent all surprises, but you can make contingency plans and create safety nets.
5. "What options will I have three years after I make the move? Five years?" Will you have more opportunities than you do now or will you feel trapped?
There's no way to predict what will happen, whether you turn left or right at the fork in the road. But the odds are something will change in three to five years. You'll be different. Your professional field will be different. Your workplace will be different. And you'll be ready to make another move.
Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., wrote Making the Big Move (New Harbinger 1999). She works with professionals who are tossing and turning over a career decision and need a coach to help them brainstorm a solution.
Website: http://www.cathygoodwin.com Your Next Move Ezine: http://www.cathygoodwin.com/subscribe.html or mailto:cathy@cathygoodwin.com with "YNM" in subject line. Contact: mailto:cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294
Monday, September 14, 2009
Average Sucks!
The very first "motivational speaker" I heard as an adult was a gentleman named Mort Utley. I experienced his speech in May of 1989 in Nashville, Tennessee, at the end of a week of Sales School with the Southwestern Company. I was 19 years old and had just finished my freshman year at the University of Wisconsin, and Mr. Utley's speech was the final component of my formal training to sell educational books door-to-door for the summer. I was absolutely coming out of my skin with an indescribable combination of intense excitement and great fear. Mort Utley's speech made one of the most "un-motivational" statements I had ever heard. He said:
"Most people do not get what they want out of Life."
How depressing, I thought. This guy gets paid large amounts of money to "motivate" people and he comes on stage and says that most people do not get what they want out of Life. Thanks for the tip, Mister genius - I suppose next you'll tell me that people from France all speak French. No kidding most people don't get what they want out of Life, I thought - WHY DO YOU THINK I AM LISTENING TO YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE?!?!?!
I didn't want to be most people, and my guess is that you don't either. If you want to be most people - broke, unhealthy, and with too little time to actually enjoy your Life - then I doubt you would be receiving this newsletter in the first place. However, throughout these installments you will have some of the things you might believe are "just the way the world is" challenged very directly, and this is the first one. We spend so much of our lives wanting to fit in and be normal that we often unconsciously find ourselves striving to be like most people. In other words, we are actually trying to be average.
In America at the beginning of 2003, here is what "average" really means...
Physically - roughly half of Americans are clinically obese.
Relationships - over half of American marriages end in divorce.
Professionally - somewhere between 75% and 85% of Americans do not like their jobs.
Financially - at least half of American households regularly struggle with "too much month at the end of money."
And I could go on and on and on. Why do I spend the first part of this supposedly inspirational article being such a bummer? Well, it's mainly because if you are serious in your quest to lead the kind of Life that you really want and really deserve, the first realization that needs to happen is that even now - in the most technologically advanced and prosperous society the world has ever seen - AVERAGE SUCKS!
But like we said earlier, you don't want to be average - congratulations. The fact that you even subscribe to this newsletter tells me that you are already on the path to being way out of the ordinary. In the coming months you are going to learn some very basic principles - principles that have been proven over literally thousand of years to help individuals and organizations see consistent upward growth in every area of Life - professionally, financially, physically, emotionally, spiritually and in all types of relationships. The great thing about success it that it's simple. Not easy, mind you, but simple. If you learn the fundamentals of successful working and living (and there are really only a few) and then apply then diligently, you definitely will achieve the things you want to be in Life. A bold statement, to be sure, but it's not really up for debate. A mentor of mine once gave me some advice that
"Success leaves clues," and
"If you do the right things long enough consistently, your success is assured."
Some of the best advice I ever received, and I've never found it to be false. I've seen these principles bring real joy and success to thousands of individuals who've followed them. At the same time, when I counsel individuals or groups that are not seeing the results they desire, they are invariably in violation of one or more of the principles we teach in our workshops and in our writing.
So to sum up; people are always asking the big questions - what is the key to success? They ask God, gurus, mentors, speakers, themselves, parents, friends, the boss, the coach, sometimes they even ask us here at Freedom Speakers & Trainers - which is why we created this newsletter. I am here to tell you that if your question is "what's the key?" your first challenge is that there is no key. It's a combination lock. The principles we teach will simply help you determine what the combination is for you. I congratulate you on walking the path - feel free to call and ask directions.
Roger Seip, co-founder of Freedom Speakers and Trainers, currently trains professionals across the country in memory, goal setting, attitude, time management, and effective communications. His newest program, P.A.C.T., is an intensive one-on-one twelve week personal coaching program designed for those who are serious about their success. Please click here for more information on Roger http://www.deliverfreedom.com/speakers_roger.html or Freedom Speakers and Trainers www.deliverfreedom.com. Call 888-233-0407 x113 email roger@deliverfreedom.com
"Most people do not get what they want out of Life."
How depressing, I thought. This guy gets paid large amounts of money to "motivate" people and he comes on stage and says that most people do not get what they want out of Life. Thanks for the tip, Mister genius - I suppose next you'll tell me that people from France all speak French. No kidding most people don't get what they want out of Life, I thought - WHY DO YOU THINK I AM LISTENING TO YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE?!?!?!
I didn't want to be most people, and my guess is that you don't either. If you want to be most people - broke, unhealthy, and with too little time to actually enjoy your Life - then I doubt you would be receiving this newsletter in the first place. However, throughout these installments you will have some of the things you might believe are "just the way the world is" challenged very directly, and this is the first one. We spend so much of our lives wanting to fit in and be normal that we often unconsciously find ourselves striving to be like most people. In other words, we are actually trying to be average.
In America at the beginning of 2003, here is what "average" really means...
Physically - roughly half of Americans are clinically obese.
Relationships - over half of American marriages end in divorce.
Professionally - somewhere between 75% and 85% of Americans do not like their jobs.
Financially - at least half of American households regularly struggle with "too much month at the end of money."
And I could go on and on and on. Why do I spend the first part of this supposedly inspirational article being such a bummer? Well, it's mainly because if you are serious in your quest to lead the kind of Life that you really want and really deserve, the first realization that needs to happen is that even now - in the most technologically advanced and prosperous society the world has ever seen - AVERAGE SUCKS!
But like we said earlier, you don't want to be average - congratulations. The fact that you even subscribe to this newsletter tells me that you are already on the path to being way out of the ordinary. In the coming months you are going to learn some very basic principles - principles that have been proven over literally thousand of years to help individuals and organizations see consistent upward growth in every area of Life - professionally, financially, physically, emotionally, spiritually and in all types of relationships. The great thing about success it that it's simple. Not easy, mind you, but simple. If you learn the fundamentals of successful working and living (and there are really only a few) and then apply then diligently, you definitely will achieve the things you want to be in Life. A bold statement, to be sure, but it's not really up for debate. A mentor of mine once gave me some advice that
"Success leaves clues," and
"If you do the right things long enough consistently, your success is assured."
Some of the best advice I ever received, and I've never found it to be false. I've seen these principles bring real joy and success to thousands of individuals who've followed them. At the same time, when I counsel individuals or groups that are not seeing the results they desire, they are invariably in violation of one or more of the principles we teach in our workshops and in our writing.
So to sum up; people are always asking the big questions - what is the key to success? They ask God, gurus, mentors, speakers, themselves, parents, friends, the boss, the coach, sometimes they even ask us here at Freedom Speakers & Trainers - which is why we created this newsletter. I am here to tell you that if your question is "what's the key?" your first challenge is that there is no key. It's a combination lock. The principles we teach will simply help you determine what the combination is for you. I congratulate you on walking the path - feel free to call and ask directions.
Roger Seip, co-founder of Freedom Speakers and Trainers, currently trains professionals across the country in memory, goal setting, attitude, time management, and effective communications. His newest program, P.A.C.T., is an intensive one-on-one twelve week personal coaching program designed for those who are serious about their success. Please click here for more information on Roger http://www.deliverfreedom.com/speakers_roger.html or Freedom Speakers and Trainers www.deliverfreedom.com. Call 888-233-0407 x113 email roger@deliverfreedom.com
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